I have nothing to say.

I’ll come up with something.

I always do.

Mom says the old man had a very good day.  My services weren’t required and that’s a good thing as it allowed me to muck out the secondary master bath and bed suite I’ve been inhabiting for the last six weeks or so.  Cats are messy and so am I.  The fact that they don’t avail themselves of modern plumbing complicates any and all sanitary imperatives I might aspire to.

Did I mention I’m lazy?

I really liked Paul Newman.  Too bad he took the dirt nap.  Helluva an actor.

My mother tells me again she’s glad I’m here and tells me the time we spend together is a treat.  This makes me very happy.  I took the time to prepare her a very special hot dog today.  Mayonnaise, mustard and coarsely chopped white onions.  Ketchup, a sharp slice of cheddar, a quartered kosher dill and chunks of vine ripened tomato with an all white meat smoked turkey frank, a little lemon pepper and a secret ingredient.  Better cold than hot, trust me.  It’s all about texture with dogs.

Protein and produce on a bun.

She brought avocados so next up is my cold stew.

In as much as the path is obvious between now and then.  As clear as is the cartography, I’m still bewildered by how we’ve progressed and simultaneously regressed so consummately.  The vulgarity and naked ugliness of racism has reared it’s ugly head upon the election of a half black President.  Dichotomy and irony hold hands all while skipping to a mysterious and confusing Lou.

One step forward, two steps back.

What in hell are we up to?

I have no personal or particular reservation in declaring the seemingly idiopathic bowel obstruction to our otherwise facile and enviously intelligent new President’s legislative agenda, to be about not much else beside the color of his skin.  After all, I have never witnessed such virulent and obstinate complaint towards a pursuit of such humanitarian and compassionate endeavors ever.  I don’t believe any generation has in this country, witnessed such fuckery, since the Civil War.

The dissent is a cheap firecracker with a loud report.  It is bullshit.

We are a nation of reckless, feckless racist slobs.  To allow this sort of ignorant, irresponsible, irrational bullshit to poison what should be an informed and historically important conversation is a stain, a remarkable and embarrassing canker of our own device THAT WE HAVE CHOSEN TO COUNTENANCE in the face of logic and goddamn common sense, well, it compels me to hate Americans.  To loathe my fellow man.  To wonder just how fucking stupid we can be.  Where is the bottom?

Just how stupid are we?

We as a country and a society are on the verge of really fucking this up.  There are those of us too weak to stand and deliver and those so recalcitrant and so too ready to shit where they eat.  Between the two, we’re looking at gorgeous pizza upside down on the sidewalk.  What follows is anarchy from hell to breakfast.  Nine ways to Sunday.  A shitstorm of biblical proportions.  Whiskey dick chaos.  Cats and dogs fornicating and reproducing.  Such unions yielding dangerous and vicious progeny not unlike a Rick Baker rendering.

Forgive my skipping too much to my own Lou, but you feel me don’t ya?  This shit is getting refuckingdiculous.

I’m beginning to wonder if I shouldn’t just concentrate on selfish fun for a few years because it’s all going to end in some mad dash for food and sundries and weapons pretty quick.  The very same thinking would lead me to seek membership in a militia.

Future’s so bright, I gotta wear shades.

Upon monitoring our mainstream media, an independent alien of other than earthly origin would be justified in concluding that the most powerful of nations has lost it’s fucking mind.  One look at the Becktard or the Human Shitsmear and they plot a course for the next nearest solar system with the potential for algae or sponges and above ground agriculture.  Any reasonably intelligent expedition is probably only carousing the universe for a place to grow leafy greens and to bang loose humanoid bitches.  We are way to high maintenance for any discriminating extraterrestrials anyway.

The very idea of corn confuses them.  It’s tasty but nutritionless.  They just can’t wrap their advanced brains around it.  That we seek to make it a source of energy confounds them.  It does me too.  They liken it to contemporary politics in America.  It makes no sense to them on any level other than their understanding that with the right amount of butter and salt, we Americans find it palatable.

Think about that.  It really is analogous to the way we deal with politics.

This is why why they keep cruising the atmosphere in green or gray hotel room service enclosures instead of stopping in for a cocktail and engaging any of us on a Taco Bell level or making land at Burning Man.  Sometimes they probe us rather invasively, but they’re just trying to understand us and our seemingly corn based existence.  They understand for example that when we ingest corn, we eliminate it in an almost completely unaltered form.  Proof that no benefit is had from its consumption.

As good a reason as any to probe us.

Earth is a great place to visit but they don’t want to live here.

I don’t blame them.

I’m so sorry for the sandwich I’ve caused you.

Drinks for my friends.

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