Archive for the ‘Ohio’ Category

Title courtesy of Jon Stewart.

Subject: The stimulus bill.

He didn’t invite them to his table, he sought to sit at theirs. He told them what he intended to do and solicited their contributions. He asked them for their ideas. He made concessions. Diluted his ideas with theirs in the spirit of bipartisanship.

Despite such pointed magnanimity, every single Republican in the house walked away. Irresponsible, single minded, tunnel vision afflicted pricks. Shameful and embarrassing. How ridiculous. Yes Virginia, Republicans are not only assholes, but deaf, dumb and blind assholes.

He knows better than they do that he doesn’t need them. They’ve been marginalized by their own actions. They are fools and he understands this better than they do. He didn’t do this to them, they are prisoners of their own device.

He walked straight at them with hands open and they chose instead to piss into the wind. Let the record show they are damp and they stink.

Like soldiers stranded on remote islands with no evidence the war is over.

Punks. Dipshits. The most clueless union of fucktards to ever inhabit our government since they were the most clueless union of fucktards ever in power. Children.

“Why behave in public when you’re living on a playground?” -David Lee Roth

Stay with me.

Are we to expect this sort of partisan obstinance to continue? Did they not get the memo? Do they not understand that they are over? Ignorance does not always prove to be bliss. Led by House Minority Leader John Boehner (Boner), The Repugnicunts marched in jackbooted lockstep. Lemmings. They haven’t even bothered to wet a finger and hoist it. They still think it’s 1992. Chronic insouciance.

Boner quotes:

“This Was a Bipartisan Rejection of a Partisan Bill” Um, what? How can it be a bipartisan rejection when it was a single party exclusively doing the rejection? Spot the retard.

“I’m just a Congressman, so I have no opinions about what the government does. My opinion on waterboarding is classified information.” -WEBCommentary

John Boehner is a clueless dickhead. The poor dumb saps from Ohio got him as substitute teacher after Tom DeLay was forced to walk the plank.

I say slash every concession out of the bill, every unecessary tax cut and let them eat goddamn cake. Our man should take full advantage of the bully pulpit and otherwise let be what will be.

There is no tangible difference between House Republicans like Boner and the CEOs that rode corporate jets to to Washington to beg for money. No different than the megalomaniacal Wall Street captains that took tax payer money for bonuses in an awe inspiring display of ostentatious avarice.

I gotta give it to Claire McCaskill for proposing legislation that would cap salaries for Wall Street execs of firms recieving TARP money at $400k, the same as President of The United States. “These people are idiots. You can’t use taxpayer money to pay out $18-billion in bonuses… What planet are these people on?” -Daily Kos

Couldn’t have said it better myself. How many of the aforementioned would you guess are Republican? I imagine the answer would delight me.

I’m reasonably sure that this style of creep is on the verge of extinction. I’d like to believe that anyway. One thing is certain, they are no longer at the wheel and that is encouraging. Fools. Insidious fools.

If House Republicans are in any way representative of the future of their party, it may be time for them to contemplate the most flattering diorama they can afford in backward ass country fuck museums across our great land. Dinosaurs anyone? Neanderthal. Cro-Magnon at the very least. Reptilian perhaps. Assholes without a doubt.

The diorama itself would have to depict various men and women in obvious sartorial business splendor fellating a variety of other similiarly attired beltway professionals with wheelbarrows of filthy lucre at the ready and nearby. The obligatory backround matte painting would include poor folks suffering from hazardous chemical contamination, non US citizens impoverished and displaced by war and The Constitution being defecated on et al.

Don’t let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya you miserable bastards.

Drinks for my friends.

Hulking giants capable of bending jailhouse bars. Not nearly as bright as some of us. Capable of limb ripping violence, though.

The Gorillas are Race, and Voter Fraud.

I don’t know what to do about election fuckery because I live in California. Evil has no interest in subverting our ballots. It can’t really. We’re a foregone conclusion, in national elections, Californians are consistently in favor of the better choice.

We’re kinda whacky.

Ohio is a long way from here, but it’s been going on there for eight agonizing years. Diebold. What a joke. CEO Wally O’Dell lives in Columbus and said he was “committed to helping Ohio deliver its electoral votes to the President” (Dumbya). -Mother Jones ’04

What kinda retard could possibly be in favor of a paperless system? No hard copy at all?

Check this: http://www.commondreams.org/views04/0225-05.htm

What do I do from Los Angeles about this drooling, stinking Simian?

The ball is yours Ohio. So is the goddamn Ape. You’ve been cheated and lawlessly manipulated. Don’t believe me? John Conyers, a Congressman from Michigan wrote a book “What Went Wrong In Ohio”. Read it. By the way, this guy rocks. Easily one of the bravest members of the United States House of Representatives. If only He and Kucinich could mate.

This election may well be in your hands again and you guys really rolled the pooch over last time and allowed Republicans a violent sexual congress with it. As did John Kerry.

You and Florida are the poster children for polling malfeasance so I’m putting you both on notice. Only you can prevent forest fires. At least Gore, and some Floridians, put up a fight.

We’ll be looking for a little more than that this time around.

Race. The other Gorilla.

My stomach flops and fills with dirty moths. There is no way to alter minds indoctrinated for a lifetime with bigotry and baseless hate in less than sixty days without an aggressive campaign of shame. Probably can’t change many minds, yet embarassing them for it might be effective.

They should be embarrassed. It and they, are archaic and absurd. They are unfortunately, everywhere.

So ubiquitous.

They are us. Inside us all, regardless of pigmentation or country of origin. The conundrum is to own it of self and be unrelenting in recognizing it in ourselves and others. All while consistently swinging a quick bat against it, all the goddamn time.

If the course of human events is allowed to continue on it’s current trajectory because the tipping point is about the color of a single man’s countenance, perhaps humankind will finally reap what it’s sown. The seeds of fear and hate will be allowed to become vines that choke and starve life from the plants of hope and resolution; deliberately deposited pods in a once rich and optimistic Earth.

That would really suck. It would be a shame. Final evidence that humans are ultimately and fatally flawed.

Proof that we suck. More stupid than smart. Our own demise.

I want to remind all of you that this is big. Very big. Bigger than a lot of you can even guess at. If and when you take it upon yourselves to sincerely contemplate the next leader of the free world, please be honest with what you are and remember this is no time to fuck around.

Drinks for my friends.