Evil Knievel died this Friday.

I really like that it was incumbent upon folks to
address him as “Evil”. That was his name.

I have to tell you that we probably have him to blame for
everything from MTV to reality television.

Maybe his ultimate legacy is insipid but the man was a
goddamn genius at being a fool. He took a simple motorcycle and jumped it over fountains and busses and then tried to ride a rocket over a canyon.

When I was a kid there was Evil Knievel, Muhammad Ali
and astronauts. These were the men who were larger
than life.

They were brave. Upon not finding an opponent, they would fight themselves. And they would lose.

They were just spoiling for a fight.

I ended up being fascinated by rocketry and science in
general. Jumped a few things on my bike and later, on
a motorcycle. Blew a lot of shit up and haven’t
punched anyone since I was twenty years old.

Woke up with a mouthfull of dirt at least once.

America was of a different mind in those days, True,
she craved distraction. But, we looked for and
embraced men who would be gladiators. Fearless men.

Evil was an individual. If he didn’t end up in a
hospital after a jump you might come across him in a
local bar. He’d shake your hand or kick your ass
depending on how you behaved.

Today, we are addicted to the slightest glimpse into
another life, despite understanding full well that
it’s scripted. All but the stupidest understand that
it’s not what it appears to be.

Talk about ludicrous. It’s fucking insane and I refuse to participate.

There was an honest need for inspiration when Evil
Knievel shot across our first color televisions.

I think the country was as broken in those days as it
is now. Then, we coveted heroes. Today society is
ever more addicted to whatever distracts.

Yes, we are less than what we once were.

The cult of celebrity has taken over. George Dumbshit
Bush could not have gotten elected thirty years ago.

Now the best the Republican party has to offer is
Guiliani and Romney. Both of them colossal, empty headed, convictionless, dipshits.

Whatever. Evil Knievel is dead. I’ll bet he was a fucking
Republican.

We barely have any idea what we even need anymore. It’s ridiculous.

RIP Mr. Knievel.

My hat is off to you Mr. Fred Hunt and your goddamn
Eightball car.

There were far better men in my driveway as a kid than now run for leader of the free world

Drinks for my friends.