City on the edge of forever

Hooptie Jesus.

I AM a lineman for the county.

January is not a salesman’s best month.  I’m angsty.  My road rage dogma is about to overtake the Karma it doesn’t understand why it wants to run down. I get angry when the sales dice catch frost.  I was killing it up until Christmas.  Right up until Savory Santa Day.  Angsty.

So anyway.  Every driver of every other car is a clown disguised as an ordinary idiot looking to make a left turn from the far right lane on a one way street clogged with pachyderm buses. Nobody at the downtown Ralph’s can operate the goddamn automated parking system and everyone in line wants to put something back they can’t afford or commit the egregious societal sin of initiating a price check.  Non-ruminant ungulates.

They tell me time flies when you’re having fun.

My problem is that I’m sick of being yanked into believing there’s a difference between the sizzle and the steak.  Too few chomp on both.  Obama breaks his populist bottle on the 2012 masthead and the banks will grease him in.  Meet the new boss; same as the old boss.  To his right is Mittens Romney.  Guy Smiley.  An elitist (he even speaks French), 1% asshole in magical underwear that Christian evangelicals despise and  conservatives as well as neo-conservatives distrust with gorgeous malice.  He’s only gotten this far because he looks presidential.

They have their man and are content to let the fools wear silly hats and run circles to distract us.

Ever seen that Star Trek episode written by Harlan Ellison?  “City On The Edge of Forever”?  I’m not sure it has anything to do with what I’m talking about here but maybe this does:

Hooptie Jesus!  I’ve just been informed by Politico that the Salamander has prevailed in the South Carolina primary.  Rockin’ good news Peanut.  It goes without saying that he won because he’s a doughy, white, unapologetic racist and the proud people inhabiting this definitive notch in the Bible Belt have made themselves heard.  Here in America we call that brand of democracy appealing to the lowest common denominator.

Republicans are so willing to forget that Gingrich was thrown out of Congress for being a mendacious hypocrite and that Reagan was a closet liberal before he devolved into a clueless, stumblefuck meat puppet.

The chances of a consensus being reached before the big stupid GOP hootenanny have just decreased by enough to have me smirking gratified. If it does end up going the distance, Mittens and the Salamander will have shredded each other so vociferously that Obama’s grin will be garnished with carrion.  Never mind that you get what you pay for and he has been. Obama. Paid for.

Maybe, just maybe, these jackasses will implode so spectacularly, wreck themselves so thoroughly, that elected Democrats will have no choice but to abandon the facile partisan bullshit they’ve been all too content to occupy themselves with and actually take a swing at representing the people that elected them as opposed to the plutocrats that bought them.

I have a dream today.

Drinks for my friends.

5 Responses to “City on the edge of forever”

  • Aria:

    This is way better than a liver transplant, especially the Ronald Regan reference and also the “stupid GOP hootenanny”. Very funny! Laughing eased my parched throat. Also liked in the article where you mentioned refrigerator art it reminded me when you and a few others were big bright, stars on the internet. Sparkles and Glitter, Yeah..there’s gold in the hills, and stars in the sky. Tripping while I sip wine and vodka, surfing intangible pleasure in a sunlit sky. To the Drink, Aria

  • Michael Douglass:

    Way better than a liver transplant? I should hope so. I was a big bright star on the internet? I don’t remember that. Do I know you? Nonetheless, lovely comment. Thank you.

  • You people out there!
    YOU’RE the stars!

    Loved that Star Trek episode, by the way- The City On The Edge of Maude’s Penis- where Kirk and Spock beam down to the surface of the has-been Earth and try to kill Bing Crosby before he delivers Hitler’s mother’s baby, and then the Gorn runs in, all mad because his Mom found out he smoked pot.
    That, my friend, was some true pulse pounding, knuckle dragging, wheel standing, axle grinding action.
    Belts for all my pants!

  • suzanne kennedy:

    Michael, I lost your phone number you have hair apt. on 2/4/12 @ noon call or email me. Suzanne

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