Archive for the ‘Libby’ Category

Just by talking.

Who is this fuck from Illinois? This Governor. An idiot. Rod Blagojevich.

Forgive me, it’s a stupid name. Just this side of pornstar without the requisite cheesy moustache. Too bad. Low hairline. Good enough. I’ve barely ever heard of this guy. He looks a little like a complete dipshit.

We likes us some Patrick Fitzgerald. Same prosecutor who smoked Scooter Libby. Subpoenaed Darth Cheney. This guy I admire. Big cubes and what seems to be a an absolute lust for truth, justice and the American way. Not pretty at all, just matter of fact. His reputation is thus: Don’t fucking lie to him.

I’m pretty sure this dickweed, Rod Blagojevich, lied to Mr. Fitzgerald. That pissed off this special prosecutor. You won’t like him when he’s angry.

Our Man should promote him. He may be compelled to.

I imagine this take down was a little easier than the Plamegate clusterfuck. The level of douchebaggery was far less sophisticated. Four of the last eight Governors of this state have been ignorant prideful dipshits. This guy, a Democrat no less, might just be the world’s premier idiot.

At least this week.

I’m not some patsy. I understand Democratic politics in Chicago. It goes back before JFK. I know. I know.

I hate hubris.

Seriously, how big of a megalomaniac must one sonafabitch be to assume he can sell a United States Senate seat to the highest bidder? I mean, the seat at play has been vacated by a President Elect. Are you fucking kidding me?

The asshole in question has an impressive pedigree. Northwestern, Pepperdine and a hardscrabble early life. I wonder if that’s why he thinks he’s someone or something he’s not. However he arrived at that notion, I loath him for it. Throw his ass on the fire. Never even talk about him again.

Rasmussen called him “America’s Least Popular Governor.” He’s a low hairline gangster. How does this happen? This is regoddamndiculous.

I understand the culture of corruption in Chicago to be pervasive but come on. Seriously. Who does this fuck imagine himself to be?

Today Our Man asks him to walk away. Dick Durbin too. To go as far away as he can get. True to form, the idiot stays and plays the idiot, turns his back instead of taking a walk. The giant vagina move. Trust me.

I honestly can’t give a mad fuck what this guy’s party affiliation is. Where do these people come from? How do they get elected? Yes, he’s a Democrat. But he’s a sociopath first. Just like Tom DeLay, Bill Frist, Kwame Kilpatrick and Larry “widestance” Craig. All ridiculous people at the end of the day.

Then an absurd populace right there in the mirror. C’mon. That’s what it is. We are responsible. Not me. Heh. The people of Illinois, the people of Sugarland Texas, Tennessee and Detroit. I wouldn’t be suprised if each one of these losers has access to the water supply of their respective constituencies.

It’s either that or most Americans are simply retarded.

Me, I think it’s some embarrassing ratio that math would demonstrate is almost exclusively absurd, somewhat retarded with a distant third being crazy.

How do Americans stay hopeful with this shit in the headlines?

We’re working on it.

Drinks for my friends.

A little levity to get us started. Salt to taste.

What’s black and white and red all over and has trouble getting through revolving doors? McFuckstain dressed as a penguin with a spear through his head, or Moosewoman, harpooned, but dressed as a nun.

No worries, they probably know about me.

Colbert has Yo Yo Ma tonight. Wasn’t but a month or so ago he had Rush. A few weeks ago, James Taylor and last week, Wynton Marsalis. Colbert doth flirt with the boundaries of cool.

The Yo Yo Ma performance inspired me to imagine a meat tenderizing hammer or a small cheese grader against my taint. I guess they played well but there wasn’t a balanced distribution of wealth. I mean frequencies. It was shrill. The interview was good though.

Ok. Onto it.

News reports say Palin is going “rogue”.

Internecine drama. Cocky up in here. Doesn’t like the way she’s been “handled”. Unhappy about her (National) rollout, Doubtfire aides quoted calling her a “diva”. This is rich. Proof in my mind of her inability to function in almost any enviroment that includes gravity. She sucks. She’s stoopid. Doesn’t get it at all.

Give her a show.

McCain’s aged ineptitude is now neon. Pyroclastic. Cool word. Poor judgement. Rash stupidity. Pandering and intellectual dishonesty. Unmindful patronizing of you and I. Adult Diapers.

The entire Republican party is a ship of fools. Consider who’s been jettisoned. It’s a list. DeLay, Frist, Santorum, Rumsfeld, Rove, Gonzales, Abramoff, Whitman, McClellan, Card, Fleischer, Ashcroft, Bremer, Brown, Libby and Powell. Just getting started………

Paul O’Neill, Franks, Richard Clark, Whitman, Foley, Larry Craig, Tenet……….

A promenade of pimps, punks, pedophiles, perverts and pirates. Sheezus, fuck me, there ought to be a law.

Snap!

Just today, Ted Stevens, slime festooned Senior Senator from Alaska (it’s a country full of rednecks way up north and a little to the west), was handed his horribly disfigured ass in a greasy paper sack with a side of leaking coleslaw and cold fries. That’s right, he was convicted on seven counts of felony corruption. Longest serving Senator in history. Prick.

Our Man drew over one hundred thousand supporters yesterday in Colorado. Five times the population of my hometown when I started school. I believe his largest domestic crowd so far. He’s on fire.

Doubtfire counted three thousand just three days ago in the very same city.

Still, it’s a contest. It is in their very best interest to keep it interesting.

There is no longer any doubt in my mind we are looking at the next President of the United States of America. My fate and yours is now inextricably linked to Barack Hussein Obama, Joe Biden, Harry Reid and the infamous Nancy Pelosi.

It’s a package deal kids, and not without expensive luggage.

With the exception of the inevitable egregious fuckery and malfeasance, which will occur on one level or another, the only thing standing in our way is ourselves. It is up to us. Entirely.

If the worst should happen, if there should be an attempt on justice a third time, well then, we should be prepared to take to the streets. They need to own that we will rise up. The third time is indeed the charm. There will be no theft. The people will decide. One way or The other.

Were it to happen, look for a movement of actual people similiar in size and strength to the inverse of current financial woes as compared to the S&L crisis of the late eighties. Sorry. In other words, tenfold. People are pissed. America’s malaise has grown on that scale for almost eight years now, any pushback will be at least as formidable. Both parties will participate.

“Fair warning Lord, don’t strike that poor boy down” -DLR

I honestly don’t anticipate such a scenario, but I’m quite prepared to go from outspoken to full blown activist. There are millions and millions ready to bust the same move. The broken Republican machine has not a prayer, not a hope in hell. You all know the trouble I’ve seen.

Step aside. Our Man is winning in unlikely states and enjoying a contest in others that haven’t considered a Democrat in decades.

Common citizens on the verge of prevailing. Joe the Plumber my ass. I think I saw an ignorant redneck.

Reality has a liberal bias. Liberals have a reality bias. There’s a healthy amount of gorgeous symmetry, given the context of American history, that a man half African and half Caucasian, is ripe to be our next President and the next leader of the free world.

There will be optimism again.

Actually, a man who will excite a sigh of relief from the world and arouse a sense of hope, even in people who hate us. Even in people who hate us.

Letterman’s got Bill O’Reilly, so I gotta wrap this up. Vote. Unless you’re stupid. Tell the boss you gotta vote and just go to Starbucks or Taco Bell or whatever if you haven’t been paying attention. Don’t shit in the river you fool.

Brainspank sees odds as nine to one for Barack Hussein Obama.

Drinks for my friends.

I knew this bomb of a tome set sail some time ago. If I knew, they knew. Trust me. McClellan telegraphed both the book and the tone thereof, months ago when he was quoted on Plamegate.

“The most powerful leader in the world had called upon me to speak on his behalf and help restore credibility he lost amid the failure to find weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. So I stood at the White house briefing room podium in front of the glare of the klieg lights for the better part of two weeks and publicly exonerated two of the senior-most aides in the White House: Karl Rove and Scooter Libby. There was one problem.
It was not true.
I had unknowingly passed along false information. And five of the highest ranking officials in the administration were involved in my doing so: Rove, Libby, the vice President, the President’s chief of staff, and the president himself.”

Again, I first read that months ago. I was a little excited. Excited like Easter morning. Excited about the egg hunt, the toys and the chocolate. In my family, it was Easter, Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Why are they all acting so suprised? This train has been belching steam for months.

Some senior campaign spokeshole for the Pantsuit named Kitty or something pined away for decency, insinuated Pasty McSquinty had somehow exhibited bad form. Whined that he had committed some political and ethical faux pas. He should have at least waited until the administration was allowed to escape. David Gergen piled on a little. He bristled at Anderson Cooper’s musing that they’re there to spin and obfuscate anyway.

Let me give you my take on it. Looks like Mr. Pasty McSquinty is my new mythical rabbit. Hoppin’ down the bunny trail. This is fascinating and glorious. I used to hate this bastard. This guy was infuckingside. They used him every day. Sent him out to be a pinata. I used to howl at him. It was comedy. They sent this poor fuck out in a straight jacket, day after day, with the words “sign language only” ringing in his ears.

I said back then it looked like the worst job in the world.

He went home and broke pencils for a while. Built birdhouses. Seethed. A quiet, but accomplished man who valued loyalty. He began to realize he was the cannon fodder they intended him to be. It was a severe blow to his heart and his ego.

Eventually, he felt liberated.

He found a passion for gardening. His flowerbeds were breathtaking.

He was able to masturbate in the shower again.

Then he wrote a book.

What he’s done is gone postal in an upper echelon Executive Branch kinda way. He’s effectively crapped down the neck of Dick-in-Bush.

On a related note, the guy who composed and performed the whistling theme song for Opie Cunningham and Andy Griffith died today.

Despite that last caveat, it’s a gorgeous set of circumstances. I thinkk the official release is Monday, the second of June. It will be Easter to me. I’ll buy the book, some candy and go to a diner for breakfast. I’ll be sure to order ham. I’ll get some some pre-packaged hardboiled eggs from the 7-11.

There may not be a thing in there I don’t already know but this is gonna be good stuff.

Drinks for my friends.

“And I saw, and behold, a pale horse: and he that sat upon him, his name was Death; and Hades followed with him………..”

Hey Chelsea, it won’t be Osama, Obama or your momma!

We’re fucked nine ways to Sunday. From hell to
breakfast.

Diseased, canker ridden rats scattering like there’s gunfire. Gonzales,
Rove, Powell, Rumsfeld, Bolton. Libby, Wolfowitz, Mike Brown, and last but not least, the three pigtardians, Franks, Tenet & Bremer.

Last three, recipients of the Presidential Medal of
Freedom. I’m guessing for being shameless at ass
licking and salad tossing at the Dick-in-Bush used car
lot.

Every once in a while I’m forced to wonder if it’s
merely stupid men for stupid times.

The answer is yes.

I really fucking hate these bastards.

Dumbya flashes across screens lastnight looking beat to
roadkill and still he foists the most ridiculous dishonest shit upon us. This smoked and spent human turd is our President. Dumb as a stump and really uncomfortable without a hand up his ass.

Then everyone piles on and does the best they can to
take our dipshit laureate seriously. Analyze and comment on the substance of his message. High fucking comedy.

Here’s an idea kids; Let Iran, Syria and the dirty
medieval Saudis help.

Why not? Stability is in their best interest. The
Saudis are pricks, but they have lots of money and
really hate the idea of a rogue nation right next door.

The Iranian people wouldn’t mind being us. It’s by
far the most progressive country in the region. They
make Saudi culture look like fucking Hee Haw with
televised executions.

This is goddamn ridiculous. Our bumbling inetptitude
resulted in a bouquet of tragedies, not the least of
which is a thorough disdain for America throughout
the region and a power vacuum in Iraq for which we are
soley culpable.

Iran’s interest might be a good idea if we thought
about inviting them to a few birthday parties and
maybe a wedding or two. We’re so fucking stupid.

All the king’s horses and all the king’s men are
idiots.

So Why?

Why do we continue to ignore all these common sense
notions?

Here’s a hint.

It weighs 800 hundred pounds, is covered in hair and
has opposable thumbs. A violent behemoth with a withering exhale and an ass that goes unwiped. The Gorilla’s name is Oil.

Actually, it’s official name is Every Natural Resource Available In The Region With An Eye Towards Greater Domination By Controlling More Of The Worlds Energy.

Dick-in-Bush have long since sublimated themselves to this reeking beast.

What we need to understand, is that there is no longer a chance to make this vile primate our bitch. At least not without a third world war which may precipitate an apocolypse of sorts.

The goddamned neocons would all experience priapism on that day I’ll tell you.

Let’s just solve this right here and now. I’m taking common sense for a hundred Alex.

The simian has left the building.

We really have only two choices:

A) Continue to make ignorant and unthinking war, including a unilateral unprovoked attack on Iran. A move that increases the probability of the US wielding nukes at some point because it will simply be all we have left. A move that may go down as humankind’s dumbest day.

B) Or, negotiate and actually enlist Iran’s help in attempting to stabilize Iraq. Stop threatining them with a radioactive ass stomping the period before recess and make friends. Introduce them to the crazy Saudis and the rest of the neighborhood kids, including those pesky Jews, and maybe start a chess club.

A lot of you still haven’t managed to wash the taste of a 70’s Iran and a dickhead Ayatollah out of your mouths. This is a fairly secular, somewhat capitalist country who’s people kind of dig us these days. They don’t like their asshole president either.

There will be horrifying bloodshed regardless. Anyone who thinks a solution is possible without rivers of it is a damn fool. This is real. So it is time to choose and these are the choices.

In the meantime it wouldn’t be a bad idea to get off the cancerous tit of fossil fuels.

Investigate hemp. Corn ruins the soil, requires toxic pesticides and is less efficient than gasoline. Turn that on it’s ear, pun intended, and you have hemp. That’s just energy.

Strongest natural fiber known to man. All textiles and plastics, viable food protein and the crop can be grown virtually anywhere and renewed every 13 to 16 weeks.

Forgive my didacticism, all I’m saying is that this not as hard as it looks. It’s solvable. Yet, only if you pay attention; back the right policies and the right people. Get your fucking heads out of your fucking asses.

OR, vote for me and I’ll save your ass.

I kinda want to be Vice President cause that’s where the power is.

Drinks for my friends.

An update of matters concerning inmate number 28301016

John Conyers from the 14th Congressional District of Michigan has announced that he will investigate the use/misuse of presidential powers of clemency. The republicans hate this guy. He knows all about Iowa and now he has juice.

This is about Dumbya taking Libby off the clothesline. It was gettin’ mighty windy, if Dumbya didn’t do something quick, Scooter’s head was gonna commence to whistle.

It’s great theater. Yesterday, tongues wagged and spittle flew. Today, Tony Snow danced like a corpse inhabited by a poltergeist. He called it “routine”. It was beyond ridiculous. Poor bastard.

The democrats have actually siezed on the one aspect so obviously germane to the big goddamn picture for once. Hillary, Dodd and Biden are all actually taking this head on. They say it ain’t right because Dumbya did it to save Cheney’s pork rind ass.

At first I was impressed, now I’m a little nonplussed. They couldn’t Man Up on war spending but they’re pissed about Scooter.

That’s kinda disingenuous. Hillary and Obama were among the handful who voted against the latest war funding bill. They just didn’t want anyone to know about it. I’m guessing both are afraid of being kicked in the vagina?

Maybe the blind, wet and shivering democrats are beginning to realize that the Machiavellian cancer in the corridors of White House power is one Richard Bruce Cheney. Just maybe, they now understand that he is therefore, the heel of Achilles.

Cut off the head and so dies the body.

I’m torn, I’m encouraged that they’ve grabbed this bull by the horns. Yet, it won’t suprise me to see them flopping in the soil because they never thought about digging in and hanging on.

Life imitates art; it’s Revenge of The Fucking Nerds.

Drinks for my friends.

Unbelievable. Or, well, maybe not.

From Air Force One Dumbya phoned in an order to commute the sentence of inmate #28301016, you may know him better as I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby, Jr. Scapegoat. Fall guy. Patsy.

The spokesholes raved and their spittle did fly.

Think the Dick-in-Bush regime are a little cranky about having their asses handed to them over their ham fisted, neanderthaloid attempts at immigration reform?

Sitting presidents typically exercise such options at the end of their tenure, when they have little left to lose.

It did give me pause, yet it was fleeting. The raw hubris on display was initially extraordinary. I admit that I was in awe at the sociopathic insolence upon hearing of it. After all, when first asked about it, Dumbya vowed to get to the bottom of it; he said he’d fire anyone responsible.

Methinks he said that because he was woefully out of the loop and didn’t have a clue as to what he should say. Poor stupid fuck that he is, he defaulted to a domestic version of “smoke ’em out”.

Ever notice how close together his eyes are?

Anyway, I then had an ephiphany the size of a slap to the forehead. These fucks still have a lot to lose.

Libby was convicted of lying to the FBI and a grand jury AND of obstructing justice. This was Darth Cheney’s chief of staff. This was about the lies told by this administration to sell us on an unjust war. Hundreds of thousands of people died over the lies this sniveling fucktard got caught covering up.

He, is the ultimate insider, privy to the entire landfill.

The lies themselves were never really revealed, they sure as fuck were never prosecuted. Now the somnambulant among you won’t be able to see where I’m going with this. I trust the rest of you will.

See that speck over there? When you first spot it you think it’s a pelican or something. Just bobbing. Maybe it’s asleep.

As the ship approaches, it shocks with it’s exponential increase. All the sudden, it’s the goddamn Matterhorn.

What it is, is the tip of the proverbial iceberg. Inmate #28301016 sits astride it like Slim Pickens on an atomic bomb in that Kubrick flick.

They had to cut this little fucker a deal, unlike the other parade of patsies, If he sings they are vapor. Trust me, he knows everything. More than a few of us know more than a little of it, but this guy can prove virtually all of it.

Wonder why he went down in the firstplace? I’ll quote myself from last month, June 12, 2007-the year of our lord:

“See kids, here’s the deal. Gonzales is the bulkhead protecting Rove and Cheney on this issue. The same way Rumsfeld was on a completely different issue. The same way Libby was. The same way Peter Pace was. Or Powell, Ashcroft, DeLay and Wolfowitz. Heard much from Condi lately? Bitch.”

Lest any of you be overly zealous in pointing out the sheer testicle mass revealed in this act by Dumbya, understand it is really quite the opposite. This was done out of genuine and legitimate fear that we’d all see the naked emperor, shriveled, purple puss leaking phallus and all.

God I hate these guys.

Drinks for my friends.

So, the no confidence vote on Gonzales went down like
a flaming depleted uranium Zeppelin yesterday in the
Senate.

Big suprise.

Ooooh. The jackass party was able to achieve lockstep
for an action that was completely symbolic. Ahhhh!

Yet with barely a glance from the great unwashed, it’s
eggshell skull was dashed upon the rocks and sensitive
brains were washed away like scrambled embryos. Eggs, I mean.

Most who’s heads were opened in the fray were already inflicted with advanced scoliosis. A few lacked spines entirely but their floating visages were held aloft by the power of knowing that what they chose to do on this day didn’t matter a bit. After all, it was a foregone conclusion and no one was watching.

Paris was back in the pokey!

Their bravery and conviction would make my lips
quiver, if I had a fucking vagina!!

Do I care if Gonzales takes the dirt nap? I realize it doesn’t matter because they’ll just plug in another asshole. They’ll probably end up amputating one prong from whoever the poor bastard is because the neocons are a two prong receptacle. They lack a seperate ground. I digress.

Fuck yes I’d like to see that scheming, hopelessly corrupt, sociopathic, dickless excuse for wearing a suit, spiral into shame and oblivion. Maybe we can trump up some child molestation charges and send him to a state prison in Texas.

Really. Wow. Our legislative branch was not even
able to label the most overt stumblefuck of the
Dick-in-Bush administration a fucktard today. He counts as the most overt one because former superstars like Rumsfeld are gone.

What’s Rummy up to? Growing herbs in a window box and maybe a little model ship building?

“A waste of time”, the elephants of the GOP had to
say.

“Republican Minority Leader Mitch McConnell chided
Democrats for ‘spending our time on a meaningless
resolution about giving the president advice about who
the attorney general ought to be.’

-from Bloomberg.

It occurs to me that the legislative branch ought get
involved when the blind and ignorant or evil and all knowing executive branch dogmatically and stubbornly supports a complete loser.

I mean, according to his own testimony, Albert with a
0 (that’s a zero kids) can’t remember what his dick looks like. What he
likes in his coffee or if we’re all created equal.

See kids, here’s the deal. Gonzales is the bulkhead protecting Rove and Cheney on this issue. The same way Rumsfeld was on a completely different issue. The same way Libby was. The same way Peter Pace was. Or Powell, Ascroft, DeLay and Wolfowitz. Heard much from Condi lately? Bitch.

I typically write these rants once I’ve worked up a
head of steam, gotten my mad on, if you will. Tonight,
not so much. I’m not suprised and can barely manage
disappointed.

Let me take another run at this.

This guy is a global embarrassment. He’s a fucking
pawn. Everyone, and I mean every one, knows what this
sycophantic automaton is about. And it’s sick, that
this piece of shit gamepiece enjoys the blanket of
neoconservative warmth. That he who is supposed to
embody justice fights so obstinately against it. This
greasy prick showed up with with Andy Card at
Ashcroft’s bedside when he was fighting for his own
worthless life, to twist his arm into allowing our
Aronists Laureate to do whatever the fuck they wanted
to do to you and me.

He doesn’t recall any of it.

Before this bastard was the law of the land he was
chief waterboy at the pissing end of Dick-in-Bush. As
White House Counsel he wrote that which he is now in
charge of defending at the pleasure of Dumbya.

This is all disturbing and profoundly disgusting on a day when Paris Hilton commands more attention than any of what I’m
pontificating about. It makes me sure that at least
in some way, we deserve it.

We do actually. We’ve allowed a scenario where our
very own elected representatives are more beholdin’ to a single
party and its jingoistic disease of dogma than the constituents at who’s pleasure they’re supposed to serve. Pricks.

Just like our military, our congress, our executives, our values, our morals, our ethics, just like all of them, our judiciary and the office of Attorney General of the United States is rent asunder. Scorched, perhaps irreparably.

Bobby Kennedy held that office and it may have cost him his life.

If that wasn’t the beginning of the end I don’t know what was.

Everyone besides Dick-in-Bush understands that this
pooch is screwed. Gangraped, from hell to
breakfast. Nine ways to Sunday. It’s over. We broke
it. Possession is ours.

Our fault.

Drinks for my friends.

And now, as we stand swaying, drunk with hubris, ignorance and power that we longer possess, swaying on the precipice of world war three, a complete disaster and perhaps what these necons seem so anxious for, the apocolypse, we learn that Condi Rice may have forgotten to tell us about something that would make the whole catastrophe moot.

My apologies for the length of that sentence. Try to stay with me.

details here and here

Apparently, there was a serious overture on the part of both the religious and political leadership at the time (2003) in Iran to not only support America’s military efforts in the region, but to also recognize Israel as a legitimate state and to engage in cogent efforts to extinguish terrorism including relinquishing ties to Hezbollah and Hamas.

We haven’t had diplomatic relations with this country since 1979 and Dr. Condoleezza Rice doesn’t remember anything about such a magnanimous and historically significant proposal. Despite the fact that Colin Powell told the the aide to Rice (Flynt Leverett) that there would be no sale at the White House.

She doesn’t remember. What’s new? Libby can’t remember shit and Dick-in-Bush act like they’re in that Ground Hog Day movie with Bill Murray.

Forgive me. Are you fucking kidding me? We walked away from that?

Dick-in-Bush and Condi too, kicked this golden goose to death and then pretended like it had never arrived on a Pennsylvania Avenue doorstep in a pretty gift wrapped basket.

Hey America! This is your foreign policy at work. Stare down the throat of the gift horse and then beat it over the head with a sledge until it draws it’s last breath in pain and confusion.

Could it be that they welcome with glee the notion of these poor bastards emerging from their holes festooned with open sores and lesions from radiation poisoning as a result of either our or Israel’s nuclear tipped bunker busters? Not unlike the undead? Like fucking zombies who are well aware of their expiration date? There are a ton of them that think very little of walking into a crowded marketplace and detonating themselves and burning and exploding everyone around them.

Am I scaring you yet? It’s right around the goddamn corner.

I intend to stay on this subject for awhile. It is literally the most important subject in the world today.

Two carrier groups and a third on the way soon. We’re standing at the fence in the front yard. They really have no choice but to wait for us to come over the fence and start shooting. And then, they will. And then. We will.

This is all a really stupid game for a prize that is in everyone’s best interest to render obsolete.

Watch for the fireworks kids. Nightly over Teheran. Sometime this spring.

Drinks for my friends………..