Archive for the ‘NRA’ Category

Greasy ones from this Jimboy’s joint here in town.  Cheese and cheap salty ground beef that will make your ankles swell.  Hard shell corn tortilla envelopes made malleable by the  copious orange grease and cheap yellow cheese.  Order an extra large Arnold Palmer because yer gonna need it.

Man I need some pot.

Life is all about curveballs and and gutterballs.

I can’t believe the lies and exaggerations of the right wing sleaze shovel jockeys.  I heard the Human Shitsmear, Limbaugh, proclaim offhandedly that the crowd for the 9/12 rally was a million plus this morning.  My jaw did not drop.  I took my my morning crap while I lamented stupidity.  Later I learned that Fox actually showed decade old pictures of the Million Man March to bolster the lie.

Hello God?  It’s me, irony.  Oh, and I’m inexcusably, as in voluntarily, retarded and therefore dangerous.

His subtlety belied the giant lie he knew he was foisting upon his audience of millions of mouth breathing cro-magnon foreheaded, backwardass, loser sycophants.  Spell check is furious with that last sentence.  The socialist Washington DC Fire Dept. estimated the crowd to be sixty thousand at best.  Some reports have it as low as twenty five thousand.

So much for the Beckian big tent circus of discontent.

Invalid soldiers, a fart in a whirlwind.  A puff of neanderthal air.  A mere mote or eye booger, in the eye of truth, justice and the American way.

Much ado about nothing at all.  Still, I’m really pissed off.

If we do some rough arithmetic based on on the median IQ actually present, I feel safe in estimating the crowd as being far less than would be required to fill your average Wal-Mart.  Disgusting.  Appalling.  I watched an unscripted clip on facebook today that revealed these mental midgets lack the capacity to discern a meaningful difference between fascism, communism or socialism, they in fact, experience profound difficulty distinguishing between plants and animals.  They hope all vegetation is in possession of a soul so that it may attend services and donate to the NRA.

Get thee back to the bog you mole and wart infested reptiles.  Their females struggle with dark black facial stubble and psoriasis.  They pollute our gene pool and water supply and poison the national discourse.  They of all people require and would benefit from government subsidy.  We do need camps for you.  Pestilent and dirty.  Please remove them for they are stupid and contagious.

What I’m telling you is these birthers, deathers, tenthers, twelvers and goddamn nimrods are foul and deleterious of our social fabric.  Dangerous idiots.  What so inspires these jackasses?  What binds them?  Where lies the crude commonality?  The glue? What could  possibly be the low common denominator?

Well, whether they know it or not, they are all, every single one of them, including their televised and broadcasted fomentors, racist fucking fucks.  Stupid, dentally challenged, pinheaded white trash.  Rationally challenged and pridefully irresponsible.

Afraid, suspicious and fearful for no sane reason.

Goddamn dumb.

I loathe them and their willful, lazy ignorance.  They conspicuously consume the snake oil so audaciously proffered by charlatan frauds like Hannity, The Human Shitsmear
(Limbaugh) and Glenn Televangeashit Beck.  They follow and believe anything anyone one of these guys purports, proclaims or posits and they are all, candidates for a prefrontal lobotomy.

Perhaps a new health care deal would rid them from us.  Maybe that’s why their so afraid.

Forgive my elaborate aspersion but it’s my sincere and most humbly earnest neurophilosophy.  If only I could shame these people.  Call them out one by one and show them how dumb and carcinogenic they are.  Just what fools they are and the damage they do.

I’d do the bonedance with Serena Williams in a heart beat.  As an agnostic, I have zero reservation in telling you that good God she’s hotter than Georgia asphalt.  Kanye West is a crotch dweller.  What a looselipped cashier.  Kanye should boil his own head.  Hubris on parade.

Drinks for my friends.

The salient point I’m about to serve up is not original.  It is not mine, I just happen to enthusiastically agree.

Names have not been changed to protect a single asshole.

Off we go.

If I hear another Republican dipshit criticize Obama’s reaction to the the Iranian election clusterfuck, when they all know as well as anyone else, for us to intervene or interfere anymore than we have is counter to foreign policy 101, with a country like Iran who’s history we’ve meddled in disastrously, I’ll projectile puke.

Shut up you idiots.  Our Man’s course of action is obvious, informed and reasonable.  What would you have him do?

Ridiculous and absurd.  Their own people asking us not to wade into their affairs again.  They are grateful for our support.  Yet they understand better than the royal “we”, that any influence perceived as American fuel in this struggle will dilute it and ultimately disease it.

Duh.

Iranians and Americans cannot afford for American government to be a component of this struggle.  It would ruin it.  It’s that simple.

The douchebags that persist in shouting that crap from the roof tops aren’t doing favors for anyone.  McCain, Bill Bennett, Lindsey Graham and Newt.  A message that only falls on the ears of the great unwashed.  The lowest common denominator.  The deaf.  The stupid.  The under informed.  The arrogant jingo assholes who think it’s our duty to force our bullshit on every other camper.

Work with me, it was this exact thinking that got us into the trouble we’re in now.

I’m here to tell you that terrorists will not be killing you in your bed.  They really are the least of our worries and even that’s an accident.  If you’re on a list as a suspected terrorist, your biggest problem will be boarding a commercial airliner.  The least of your inconveniences are buying guns or explosives.  If you are an evil doer (love those two words), your best bet is some destruction at home as opposed to interstate travel.  Our advice to you is to shit where you eat.  The current terrorist watch list of more than a million members, does not prevent anyone from purchasing guns or even explosives, interstate travel however, is far more difficult.

You bet.  Yeah baby we’re on it.  Fear not, the NRA has your back.

It’s a goddamn joke and we are pigs.

God has not even dick to do with it.

An election was stolen from the Iranian people.  They are indignant and I understand.  I think they just might be an example to us.  C’mon.  Their bravery is awesome.  We have been giant vaginas.  Forgive the gender aspect.  I’m just saying.

We should stay out of it for obvious reasons and let them show us how it’s done.

I’m getting tired of American hubris.  Who the fuck do we think we are?

Drinks for my friends.