Last night, I met a man named Elmer Pinto. He was recovering from an injury. I would describe him as swarthy.

I really like blood orange juice.

My girlfriend, not so much. This works in my favor. The penalty is heartburn.

I’ve become somewhat of a banker. The worst part is the monkey suit. Kenneth Cole baby.

All the sudden I’m doing mad math. That part of my brain is dusty and smells of moths and tadpoles in a bucket of stinking algae.

I’m not at all confused by this financial bronco, bucking and foaming with mad eyes. Destroying everything. I’ve been predicting it for years. It makes complete sense to me. Walk in the park. I understood that under Dick-in-Bush, the idea of an “ownership society” was complete crap. An absolute lie.

Our Man has known it for quite some as well. He’s been talking about this fallacy for years. Same as me. Great minds think alike. We don’t miss the obvious.

I watched Bill Maher tonight and learned that white women in America can be counted on to be abject bimbos, this includes Sarah Palin. Forgive me but this Palin phenomena is inexcusable. It’s a goddamn farce and her pantsuit is as empty as Dumbya’s Armani.

I never cared about the charges of sexism. It’s bullshit. She sucks and anyone with half a brain knows it. I won’t even contemplate an apology. She’s done nothing, been nowhere and doesn’t know shit. I know intelligent people that are buying it. I can’t figure it.

Join me. Be wary of it all. Be suspicious. Be incredulous. At least be fucking confused.

We’ve gone almost eight years under leadership by a suit painfully empty. Painfully empty. No responsible course of action on any major issue. Everything, every aspect of every major issue they chose to engage, has turned to shit. Inept, misguided, out of touch and criminal. Not necessarily in that order. It has all gone to shit.

How did we get here?

On a ship of fools. A trillion fucking dollars and we have no choice. No choice. Exponentially more severe than the S&L nightmare and the tech bubble. We’re hearing comparisons to the Great Depression from the mainstream media. Fuck me. Fuck you. We’re about to be a third world country.

So let’s keep spending a half a billion a day in Iraq. Great idea. For what again? Tell me why we’re there?

Johnny Deregulation and his Prince of peril, Phil Gramm have more fingers in this pie than the entire Democratic party. His suggestion was to commission a study. Yep, Doubtfire took the absolutely audacious and brazen step of proposing we look a bit harder at it. Get some eggheads in here to tell us what we already know. Brilliant.

Krugman on Maher says we’re fucked for a while. Krugman from the NYT and Princeton, is the real deal, tells it like it is. Naomi Klein says we’ve simply moved the disaster from Wall Street to Main Street. A debt that will explode on you and I. Count on it.

This is gonna suck.

Andrew Sullivan looks thinner to me. A gay conservative Republican who talks a lot of sense.

I loves me some Bill Maher. I hear he’s an arrogant prick. I don’t doubt it. A lead singer with lead singer disease. Moving right along.

Then there’s the notion of Mr. Obama for President.

You know, forgive me for oversimplifying, but what we have here is fear. It is fear of guilt. The older you are, the more likely you have participated in actual racism. Maybe you just tolerated it, but the fear among America’s middle aged and older is genuine. Many of them know they have behaved badly and they are afraid. Very reluctant to own it. Get over it you spineless pricks.

There it is. That is what we’re up against.

The idea that they’re willing to buy Sarah Palin and Doubtfire hook, line and sinker is proof of the rampant stupidity that infects them.

It is regoddamndiculous.

I know I’ve been here before. To warn you. Here I am again. To warn you. Help me out here. Let me know you’re listening, Tell me you’re passing it along. Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, work with me? Please.

It just doesn’t get any more important than this.

Drinks for my friends.

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