Archive for the ‘Kucinich’ Category

So Newt Gingrich declares he’s not a citizen of the world to applause by the most prominent collection of misfit toys ever to gather on an annual schedule.  John Voight, the same whackjob who melted down on public airwaves a few years back over his superstar daughter Angelina Jolie’s estrangement, called Obama a false prophet and told us America is weaker.

Newt also told them the brand new economic plan has already failed.  This, despite news today that ten banks are set to repay almost ninety billion in stimulus money.  This,  despite it being way too early to tell.

This blog is for you Lo.  I understand that Objects in Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear.  The big picture is far more convoluted than most of us know.  It is far greater than the sum of it’s parts.  Both sides have bodies buried and there’s no innocence in Washington; I am not a Nuclear Playboy.

It’s just that people like Ralph Nader and Dennis Kucinich, whom I adore, have no real chance at influencing seminal policy, much less posturing for the highest office in the land.

You see this administration as a glass half empty.  I’m not ready to go there yet.

When was the last time a President of the United States told Israel in front of the world, in an Arabic Muslim nation, that her actions were intolerable?

You graciously offered an article on the similarities between Bush and Obama for this particular context: http://www.internationalpoliticalwill.com/2009/06/heard-it-all-before/

Ironically, it’s context that Will is ignoring.  Just about every speech by Bush that Will cites took place inside our own borders.  I commend him for his research acumen, as he’s painstakingly culled all these examples of congruence from over six years of lexicon, far more muted and less specific than that of Obama’s single speech in a Muslim country delivered to Arabs.

It’s a manufactured duck and weave befitting a high school research paper.  No score here Lo.  Your man Will has written a fluff piece.  I’ve taken it upon myself to post an edited version of this critique on his blog.

You know I hope, that I have immense respect for you.  Thanks be that you’re far better informed than most.  I wonder if you haven’t taken the wrong fork on your philosophical/ideological path.  You’re energy and intelligence is lost on wanna be demagogues  like Ralph Nader who only run for office out of hubris and the obstreperous notion they may upset a close election.  If Ralph Nader truly wanted to make a difference he would position himself politically to do so.  Perhaps an earnest and sincere attempt at a cabinet position or a prominent non-profit.

Ralph Nader may be as full of shit as the next guy.

And you my dear, would be better served by getting on board with a society and an ethic that is changing.  Just because I support Obama, doesn’t mean I can’t bitch at him.  It gives greater license to do just that.  See last night’s blog.

I’m not, by any means, hook, line and sinker.  He’s not perfect, I own that.  But in a few short months he’s managed to fundamentally change the way the rest of the world looks at us.  Take the recent elections in Lebanon as an example.  The amount of influence he brought to bear is debatable but there’s no denying he brought some.  This is big stuff.  He’s the best thing we’ve had in a very long time.  Work with me here.

Don’t look away, there’s plenty to see.

Drinks for my friends.

God is good, God is great, thank you for the food on this plate.

My three favorite words: Former President Bush.

What sort of populace gets behind a John McCain and a Sarah Palin? Sheezus.

Barack Hussein Obama is our new President. A lovely, classy and intelligent wife, Michelle Obama, is our new First Lady. Along with Malia and Sasha we have a shining new First Family.

Kinda golden.

Already so much light and hope against such obvious contrast of our last First Family and the politics of fear the entire administration breathed and exhaled. Dark, evil bastards. Insert stir sticks into each of their penises because they all sucked so bad. Yes Condi too.

Pricks.

The pooch could not have been screwed any harder, more egregiously or with any more violence. History will judge, in a matter of fact fashion and the administration of George W. Bush will either be seen as the catalyst for the end of humankind or the worst in in American history. Pray for the latter.

With all my anticipation, hope, skepticism, doubt and excitement, I still can barely believe this is happening. Such a profound accomplishment, such a miraculous turn of events. I’m only able to liken it to some monumental but individual achievement. Lance Armstrong or Michael Phelps. Unbelievable humans but it really is so much bigger than that.

Exponentially larger.

The thing is this; one man has inspired an entire nation more than enough for it’s people to move in concert with a singular purpose.

Surreal indeed. Huge. In the context of world history, in the course of human events, massive, a gravity all its own.

So very disillusioned, disenchanted and disgusted with my fellow Americans, I wasn’t able to imagine a day like today. There were times so long and bleak, I assumed we were lost. Too far gone. Eight long years with every bigot, redneck, head in the sand ignorant bastard, gleefully but unwittingly complicit in America’s demise. The great unwashed appeared to have prevailed. All the good and the just forgotten and those who had dared pay attention could no longer be bothered to care. Stupidity and apathy ruled the day.

I championed Kucinich for his outrageous honesty. I still adore The Little Paste Eater. Then Edwards for his sincere populism and what I saw as enough charisma to make him electable. I will tell you that a year or so ago, I didn’t believe Our Man had a chance. I never doubted him, I did however, underestimate the American people. Forgive me, I had every reason.

Best mistake I’ve ever made. As thrilled as I’ve ever been to be completely wrong.

He began to remind us that this thing was not about him, it was about us. He was right. Unmistakably. That really is the short answer to how this happened. It was his confidence, composure, intelligence and cool. It was his message, his conviction and the unmitigated, egalitarian truth of what he was telling us.

The other thing is this; he does not hesitate to remind, this is about us. In other words, if we fail to stay engaged, forget to pay attention and participate, we will be lost. Exactly how we got this far is how we will succeed. Nothing less will do. He tells us without reluctance that he will falter. He says as much to let us know that when he does, the onus is ours to rise up and be heard.

He’s does not merely ask us. He’s telling us.

It is obvious that Our Man is antithetical to the last man we called leader. One hundred eighty degrees opposite. Phase shift complete. A crisp, abrupt and elegant reversal of ideas and approach. Above all, inclusive as opposed to exclusive. The size of government matters far less than whether or not it actually works.

He stands and he will deliver. He is extraordinarily capable and adroit, but each of us must assume responsibility. Individually and collectively.

He’s telling us this won’t work unless we are right here with him, his family and all the lawmakers and bureaucrats around him. Without you and I, America executes a pristine belly flop, an immaculate face plant, an end of times as we understand them.

Let me explain something else to you. Real Blues music is there to make you happy, not sad. See, they sing and play about hard times but The Blues is about performance and passion. If it’s real you walk away with a smile and your heart is a little bit lighter.

If it’s real, it’s like putting your hand in rich dark soil and coming up with an onion or a fat carrot.

I’m here to tell you that since there is no rest for the wicked, there is barely a lungfull for the rest of us.

Miles to go before we sleep.

Drinks for my friends.

Hulking giants capable of bending jailhouse bars. Not nearly as bright as some of us. Capable of limb ripping violence, though.

The Gorillas are Race, and Voter Fraud.

I don’t know what to do about election fuckery because I live in California. Evil has no interest in subverting our ballots. It can’t really. We’re a foregone conclusion, in national elections, Californians are consistently in favor of the better choice.

We’re kinda whacky.

Ohio is a long way from here, but it’s been going on there for eight agonizing years. Diebold. What a joke. CEO Wally O’Dell lives in Columbus and said he was “committed to helping Ohio deliver its electoral votes to the President” (Dumbya). -Mother Jones ’04

What kinda retard could possibly be in favor of a paperless system? No hard copy at all?

Check this: http://www.commondreams.org/views04/0225-05.htm

What do I do from Los Angeles about this drooling, stinking Simian?

The ball is yours Ohio. So is the goddamn Ape. You’ve been cheated and lawlessly manipulated. Don’t believe me? John Conyers, a Congressman from Michigan wrote a book “What Went Wrong In Ohio”. Read it. By the way, this guy rocks. Easily one of the bravest members of the United States House of Representatives. If only He and Kucinich could mate.

This election may well be in your hands again and you guys really rolled the pooch over last time and allowed Republicans a violent sexual congress with it. As did John Kerry.

You and Florida are the poster children for polling malfeasance so I’m putting you both on notice. Only you can prevent forest fires. At least Gore, and some Floridians, put up a fight.

We’ll be looking for a little more than that this time around.

Race. The other Gorilla.

My stomach flops and fills with dirty moths. There is no way to alter minds indoctrinated for a lifetime with bigotry and baseless hate in less than sixty days without an aggressive campaign of shame. Probably can’t change many minds, yet embarassing them for it might be effective.

They should be embarrassed. It and they, are archaic and absurd. They are unfortunately, everywhere.

So ubiquitous.

They are us. Inside us all, regardless of pigmentation or country of origin. The conundrum is to own it of self and be unrelenting in recognizing it in ourselves and others. All while consistently swinging a quick bat against it, all the goddamn time.

If the course of human events is allowed to continue on it’s current trajectory because the tipping point is about the color of a single man’s countenance, perhaps humankind will finally reap what it’s sown. The seeds of fear and hate will be allowed to become vines that choke and starve life from the plants of hope and resolution; deliberately deposited pods in a once rich and optimistic Earth.

That would really suck. It would be a shame. Final evidence that humans are ultimately and fatally flawed.

Proof that we suck. More stupid than smart. Our own demise.

I want to remind all of you that this is big. Very big. Bigger than a lot of you can even guess at. If and when you take it upon yourselves to sincerely contemplate the next leader of the free world, please be honest with what you are and remember this is no time to fuck around.

Drinks for my friends.

Doubtfire can’t seem to keep his withered manhood from beneath his corrective footwear. Just last week he called for the “exploitation” of America’s offshore and enviromentally sensitive areas for drilling. A top economic adviser to McCain, Phil Graham, said we were in a “mental recession” and a nation of “whiners”. Bootlicker continues to joke about bombing Iran.

He’s doing great. Let’s have a parade. They’re better be midgets and firetrucks.

Methinks his diaper hath sprung a leak.

An exemplary performance most likely the harbinger of an inevitable conclusion.

I’m inclined to believe it’s no longer premature to offer my ideal choices for Our Man’s cabinet.

The thing to remember is this. Our Man, upon winning the most important contest in the history of civilization, will also own, arguably, the worst position of any American President ever. He’s walking into a cave as dark as any in the history of this country.

His road will be of asinine yet lethal burlesque.

Secretary of State:
The apogee of any diplomatic career, my pick is Big Bad Bill. There simply is no man more gifted and revered on the world stage than William Jefferson Clinton. I don’t give a mad fuck about his stumbles on this most recent sojourn as his wife’s campaign surrogate. The prodigous talent this man is able to visit upon any scenario makes the former President an obvious choice as well as one to ignore at our peril in times as serious as these. Bill Clinton qualifies as an official brainspank endorsement. Further, this appointment will incur the good favor of we here at brainspank.

Alternates include Jimmy Carter, Andy Griffith was always so reasonable and Joe Walsh would clown the world and play blistering solos.

Secretary of the Treasury:
Bill Gates. The world’s richest man understands money. He owns trends. He gets it. The Feds took over IndyMac the other day. FDIC payouts will be as much as $8 billion. There’s Fannie and Freddie crashing on the rocks. Those two go down and it won’t be too different than a small nuke in a major city.

Hang the rich.

Alternates include my friend Jim Labinski, Gene Hackman, Ben Vereen, Lorne Green and Jim Beam.

Attorney General:
Walk in the park. My mother pointed it out. Edwards. A lawyer who’s adept at kicking the shit out of some pretty big boys. Nice and liberal. Wads of charisma. He’s Bobby goddamn Kennedy. John Edwards qualifies as an official brainspank endorsement. Further, this appointment will incur the good favor of we here at brainspank.

Alternates include Ironman, Judge Judy, people who collect beans and Negrodamus.

Secretary of Defense:
Wes Clark. Four stars, West Point valedictorian and Rhodes Scholar. I love the word secdef. He’s my pick for secdef. It’ll have to wait, I’ve got a meeting with the secdef. See what I’m saying?

Seems like a good guy. We liberals want our military leaders to smile a lot and have nice eyes. We also like it when they’re whip fucking smart and battle experienced with nearly spotless records. General Wesley Clark qualifies as an official brainspank endorsement. Further, this appointment will incur the good favor of we here at brainspank.

Runner up: Colin Powell. Yep, seriously. A good man and a smart one.

Alternates include Furnell Chapman, Ernest T. Bass, auntjudy.com and Bilbo Baggins.

Secretary of Energy:
Al Gore. Hey everybody! Let’s have an energy policy! Fuckin A! Seriously. Why are we fucking Iraq? Oil. Why are we fucking ourselves? Oil. Why are we fucked? Oil. Duh. I got one syllable for ya. Sun. Nevermind that it makes wind and everything else possible. See what I’m saying? Albert Gore qualifies as an official brainspank endorsement. Further, this appointment will incur the good favor of we here at brainspank.

Alternates include Kurt Vonnegut, John Steinbeck, any civilian on COPS, Nikola Tesla and Barney Fife.

Secretary of Homeland Security:
What I’m looking for here is one of those three part names with the word VON in the middle. Wernher Von Braun, for example. We all know this position is a shallow history of dipshits. Joe Biden is an intelligent hothead. Wish I had better for him but he’s my choice. He’s smart and he loathes bullshit.

Alternates include Fred Flinstone for sheer mental prowess, Donna Summer for Disco Lemonade, Larry Flynt for a golden wheelchair and enormous genitals.

Secretary of the Interior:
Willie Nelson. He’ll legalize pot on all government lands and convert every forest service/state park vehicle to biodiesel. There would be a national hootenanny every summer solistice.

Alternates include Newman and Redford, Cheech & Chong, and the Smothers Brothers.

Secretary of Education:
My ultimate preference would have been George Carlin but he’s since taken the dirt nap. Posthumous. I guess I’ll go with Gore Vidal. He’s smart, crazy, gonna die soon and I like his priorities. Wait, Noam Chomsky!

Alternates include Al Bundy, Mr. Spock, Henry Rollins and Alex Trebek

Secretary of Health and Human Services:
Dr. Sanja Gupta. Handsome, charismatic, smart and charming.

Alternates include Dr. Dean Edell and Dr. Drew Pinsky.

Director of the National Drug Control Policy:
Bill Maher. This one’s painfully obvious. Reverse this ridiculous obfuscation they choose to label policy. It’s unconscionable. America incarcerates more people per capita than any nation on earth and it’s because of hundreds of thousands of nonviolent drug offenders who aren’t criminals when they enter the prison system but sure as fuck are when they get out. An absurd and failed attempt at social engineering. It doesn’t work. It never had a chance.

Mankind has sought to self medicate since before it was even a possibility. It’s like shoving abstinence down the throats of American teenagers. No possibility for efficacy, no chance ever. It’s counterintuitive, misguided and in opposition to basic human instinct.

It’s a fundamental cudgel for oppression by our government and really fucking stupid.

Alternates include Snoop, Adam Corolla, Lee Van Cleef and Willie Nelson.

White House Chief of Staff:
Jon Stewart. Duh. He’d also be White House press secretary. I’d swoon at the podium in a non gay way. Mancrush. He’d tell us the truth and crack us up whenever his boss fucks up. He’d be allowed to bring his writers with him.

Alternates include Sean Penn, Cris Rock and Lewis Black. Lewis Black……….oooooooohh.

Administrator of the Environmental Protection Agency:
Dennis Kucinich. When a Supreme Court vacancy occurs, he’s the man. He carries the Constitution on his person. Otherwise he’d run the shit out of the EPA. Smart, honest, principled. He’ll do the right thing. He’ll fuck shit up. Between his pasty white thighs dangle testes made of zirconia. Bitch. This would be good. Dennis qualifies as an official brainspank endorsement. Further, this appointment will incur the good favor of we here at brainspank.

Alternates include Al Gore, John Mellencamp and Don Henley.

Secretary of Transportation:
Ed Begley Jr. Ed knows. Ed cares. Ed will tear shit up. This would be good. Ed qualifies as an official brainspank endorsement. Further, this appointment will incur the good favor of we here at brainspank.

Alternates include Robbie Knievel, Dave Grohl and Scotty from Star Trek because he operates the transporter. Well, we’re both Scotsman.

Secretary of Veterans Affairs:
Anthony Zinni. We need an intelligent hawk in this office. He’s accomplished. Degree in economics from Villanova. Tough. Four stars and tons of experience. Opposed to at least the prosecution of the war in Iraq. Got fired for it. I’m going out on a limb but I think he’s a man of logic and compassion. Anthony qualifies as an official brainspank endorsement. Further, this appointment will incur the good favor of we here at brainspank.

Alternates include Maj. Gen. Paul Eaton, Maj. Gen. John Batiste, Brig. Gen. John Johns, Navy Vice Adm. David Richardson……….no shortage of good men to oversee the right thing.

Secretary of Agriculture:
What we need here is someone adamantly anti ethanol. Fuel from corn is just dumb. It’s a destructive crop. Bad for the soil. Tons of pesticides It’s only redeeming quality is that it tastes good and it can be made into whiskey. It’s like twice the resources/energy to produce as it ends up producing. There’s already chaos on the world food market as a result of incremental increases in it’s production. Why are we so goddamn stupid? We need an enforcer. A sonofabitch.

That sonafabitch is Chuck Norris. He is what we lack in government. He’s a goddamn Republican, but a grown man that is capable and willing to roundhouse kick other men in the head. Chuck Norris did not slide from a common vagina. He was borne of the ultimate mother. Mother Earth. He will fight for you harder than Larry H. Parker.

Alternates include Bruce Willis, Spiderman, spaghetti western banditos and Sgt. Joe Friday.

Secretary of Housing and Urban Development:
Dumbya. He needs to see what he has wrought at least five days a week. The damage he’s done to the average American family as well as the madness he’s unleashed on those families with soldiers in Iraq or dead or wounded from Iraq.

Brains scarred with or without a head wound.

Astounding, to behave as though you’ve done nothing but act in our best interest. I doubt a man as stupid even as you, could believe anything remotely resembling that sort of madness. It’s okay Georgie boy. you’ll be the titular head, a position so familiar, it’s all you know. Loser.

No worries, we’ll surround him with genuine talent to show him smart people who care against the worthless ones he hired. He’s a dog in a talent show. “Brownie” can be your office boy. Rove and Cheney will share shifts in the executive washroom.

Secretary of Commerce:
What’s needed here is a pro American worker, pro union. The outsourcing and weakening of American industrial capability must be administered to like the sucking chest wound that it’s become. Enough is enough. I’m looking for someone pretty adept with green industry.

An individual capable of overseeing an investment in our infrastructure that is far more enviromentally responsible than we’ve been so far. A man or woman capable of acting as a genuine secretary for the logistical nightmare of taking funds from the wrong things and directing them towards the right things. An intelligent hard ass.

Hills? She wouldn’t stoop for this turd. Arianna Huffington? Her grasp of the dynamic is unique and abundant with nuance. No way. Ted Nugent? Too stupid.

Any character from The West Wing.

This one has me stumped. Suggestions are welcome.

My point is, this cabinet position is ripe for empowerment. It could benefit immensly from the right candidate possessing the ability to wield influence and charisma to make the post and it’s authority pivotal.

See above for alternates.

Secretary of Housing and Urban Development:
Oprah, Seann Penn, Brad and Angelina. Together they’ve done far more for the dislocated in New Orleans than our own government. Make it a collective effort and they’ll appoint a staff of capables. If they start to get fucked on funds or legislation, who’s not gonna send a camera and a microphone?

United States Trade Representative:
Bill Richardson. He gets it. He’s smart, experienced and an adroit negotiator.

Alternates include Jack from Jack In The Box, Gandalf and most migrant workers.

Director of the Office of Management and Budget:
What we need here is an honest individual. Joe Biden would be good here too. Chuck Hagel? Yep. I want a thoroughly vetted individual, with integrity and a strong sense of personal accountability. I’m stumped on this one too.

Alternates include David Letterman, Bullwinkle and Bobby Brady.

I’m not prepared at this time to offer a choice for VP. Forgive me. Further study is needed. Trust that I’ll keep you posted.

Bitches.

Drinks for my friends.

It’s bad enough what they did.

Dick-in-Bush sneered at the Fourth Amendment and gleefully engaged in an end run around existing FISA laws to illegally wire tap and otherwise surveil American citizens. They didn’t tell anybody. They even attempted to strong arm a United States Attorney General while hospitalized in critical condition to sign off on their egregious trangressions.

They sent Gonzales and Andy Card.

Upon The Grey Lady exposing them in early 2005, they postured for all the world like they had done nothing wrong and in fact, had our best interests in their heart of hearts along with the telecom companies that were complicit.

If you bought that when it went down, I’d like your phone number and credit card info.

Dumbya then called for retroactive immunity for those companies because he understood very well that they had violated the law and the Constitution and were they ever held accountable, well then, he would be too.

So the sycophantic Republicans floated a bill to make everything milk and honey for the telecom giants and therefore Dick-in-Bush. I was proud of the Democrats when they stood on principle and said no fucking way.

Responding on January 28, our man Obama said:
“I strongly oppose retroactive immunity in the FISA bill.

Ever since 9/11, this Administration has put forward a false choice between the liberties we cherish and the security we demand.

The FISA court works. The separation of power works. We can trace, track down and take out terrorists while ensuring that our actions are subject to vigorous oversight, and do not undermine the very laws and freedom that we are fighting to defend.

No one should get a free pass to violate the basic civil liberties of the American people – not the President of the United States, and not the telecommunications companies that fell in line with his warrantless surveillance program. We have to make clear the lines that cannot be crossed.

That is why I am co-sponsoring Senator Dodd’s amendment to remove the immunity provision. Secrecy must not trump accountability. We must show our citizens – and set an example to the world – that laws cannot be ignored when it is inconvenient.” -firedoglake.com

For what it’s worth, The Little Paste Eater stood proud and quoted Ben Franklin to remind us that those who would sacrifice liberty for safety deserve neither.

What’s worse is what we did. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi along with a hundred and five Democrats, aided in passage of a bill that DOES provide immunity for the telecom arm of the plutocracy. Our own man Obama brought gravel chunks of salt to the laceration by declaring his support for the “compromise”

He said in a published statement:

“It does, however, grant retroactive immunity, and I will work in the Senate to remove this provision so that we can seek full accountability for past offenses.” -Salon.com

Let’s cut to the chase. He says this, knowing full well how unlikely such an effort is to enjoy the remotest chance of success. Even Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid acknowledged the dubiousness of such.

Fuck this shit. It’s a fool’s errand and Mr. Obama is no fool.

They all know it will pass the Senate as though lubricated with Crisco. So easily was it shat by the House after insertion of a suppository chock full of fear, terrorism and national security paranoia.

Mr. Obama, fuck this shit.

You are here, a man who will most likely be the next President of The United States of America, because we the people have put you here. We put you here, because we have been led to believe that this is precisely the brand of malfeasance you will fight against. You have ignited in us a hope, that this brand of fuckery will not be allowed, not tolerated, not even negotiated.

The law has been broken and you know it.

The idea that you would break our hearts this early, in context of a principle this vital, disturbs and gives me pause. Thus far, despite your imperfections, I’ve believed in you. In this instance however, I simply cannot abide. It makes me furious that otherwise my choice is an asshat like McCain.

Don’t do this to me. Don’t do it to us. When, inevitably, efforts to remove immunity from the bill fail, vote against it. Stand on principle, the rule of law and most important, why we have come to believe in you.

Tests for you so far have been Fisher Price, pale, in the face of this most important one so far. There is no room to move here. It is as black and white as a moral imperative can be.

Vote against it. I almost care less about the outcome than I do your vote.

What exactly are you so afraid of?

Hey Barry, this isn’t change we can believe in.

Drinks for my friends.

There are times, like now, when you people amaze me.

Self righteous liberals can be a pain in the ass.

I supported arguably, the longest shot Democrats had to offer for the nomination. Dennis Kucinich, my Little Paste Eater. I wrote about him for months. I hoped. His message was pristine. I agreed with him on everything. We disagreed on nothing.

I’m a liberal juggernaut and so is Mr. Kucinich.

I felt all who supported Dennis could afford to do so. It was the first quarter and the grass was green. We had political will and capital to spend. At the very least we could have a hand in steering the dialog towards what was true. Plenty of room for optimism.

It was early. Absolute truth was contagious.

“No I want you to fuck it. Shit, yes, pour the fuckin’ beer!” -Frank Booth, Blue Velvet

Eventually, we came to understand that our man was not to be. We went our seperate ways. I leaned into Edwards. Many of us did. It became apparent this hope would not bear fruit either. The pragmatic among us made another necessary, albeit painful, adjustment.

Turns out, we were right.

I threw myself and my rhetoric behind Obama without regret. He’s a good man. If you’re a regular reader, you’re aware of my conviction. No hesitation. He is what we need.

What I simply cannot wrap my brain around is you people who stubbornly, foolishly, behave as though ships sail off the edge of our world to this day. You who believe somehow that Nader, Paul or Gravel will magically discover the ability to make pigs fly out of the asses of the electorate.

Seriously, what’re you people smoking?

We have but one shot here. It is do or die to keep a bumbling idiot like McCain from marching us towards disaster of biblical proportions. This is no time for ideological naivete. This is it.

Really. Knock it the fuck off. You’re not helping anything or anybody.

I will make no apologies for our man Obama’s imperfections at this point. Too late and entirely beside the point. It has long since ceased to be about guys like Nader et al.

The wisest course is to get him elected and not let up for a heartbeat. Change, you bastards. That is why he is here and that’s why we are here. That is why we will not go gentle into that goodnight. It is why we will no longer fail to open our mouths. It is why they will end up confused after failing to shut us up.

If we’re lucky, someday men like Nader will show up in well worn shoes and people will listen. Men like Kucinich will speak of the constitution and America will pay attention. We have a chance at being what we once were. Too much zeal is likely to cost us the first step.

Put away your toys kids and get your heads in this game.

Don’t make me have to tell you again. Don’t make me stop this car.

Drinks for my friends.

Why that would be our man. The Little Paste Eater. Dennis Kucinich introduced thirty five articles of impeachment against Dumbya in the House o’ Reps last night.

He’s already delivered a carp in newspaper to Darth Cheney. Cheney had it deposited in a dumpster far from his residence and shot the man who delivered it in the crotch with an antique blunderbuss. There were reports claiming his footwear was very pointy that afternoon.

I would not deign to tongue the sack of the esteemed Paste Eater myself but I can be counted on to pitch in for hookers and booze. I’m good like that and everyone knows a man needs his balls licked now and then. I’m just goddamn giddy over this. Kucinich rocks.

Didn’t see it on TV today. After all it was really only about illegally spying on us and lying about every aspect of the war.

I understand Britney is contemplating having her vagina removed.

Did you hear McClellan is gonna show up before the House Judiciary?

Oh, and the second part of some Senate intelligence report came out last Thursday saying pretty much the same thing.

It’s nuts. One of the most logical reasons to leave Iraq is that there was a complete absence of logical reasons to show up and do what we did. If you sincerely believe the world is safer, you’re an idiot.

If you think we’re fighting them over there so we don’t have to fight them over here you’re not being intellectually honest with yourself and you might be an idiot.

If you believe you’re better off than you were six or seven years ago, you’re rich and most likely greedy. Or, you’re an idiot. Not mutually exclusive terms by the way.

If you think the health of the planet is not being influenced by the fact that their’s too fucking many of us you’re being intellectually dishonest with your bad self. Good chance you’re an idiot.

If you’re of the opinion that John McCain is going to do anything other than add tonnage to your financial burden, you have ‘assfasia’. A condition where one’s face resembles ones ass so closely that the bowels are confused as to which way to move. Same diagnosis if you’re of the mind that he has a clue about what to do in Iraq, Iran, Afghanistan or any country that starts with a U.

Braincheck.

I’ll be urging you to eschew obfuscation and avoid being stupid until early November.

Drinks for my friends.

I just need to talk about a few things here.

First up, this retarded stimulus package Republicans and Democrats alike are toothlessly masticating each other’s genitals over. Six hundred dollars (!) for each of us grossing less than seventy five thousand a year.

You have got to be fucking kidding me.

What they’re hoping is, we’ll go out and blow that magnanimous sum and the economy will just explode and all will be sunshine and rainbows.

You have got to be fucking kidding me.

That’s the plan?

I’m insulted.

Six hundred bucks buys me about three hours in a Vegas titty bar with a couple of clients. Brilliant.

Or, I could score just enough booze and blow to rationalize hiring a hooker, likely succumb to whiskey dick and the subsequent ego deflation that accompanies losing one’s wood and/or never achieving it to begin with.

As a Southern California resident, were I to earmark said funds for more pragmatic utilization, it would mitigate approximately a third of my monthly rent. Less than that of a mortgage note or a month’s payment on a decent car.

Republicans and Democrats have reached out to each other for your benefit and are now offering a medium size self adhering gauze bandage for your middle class ass hemorrhage. The bastards of the beltway are powerful sorry about the diabetes they gave you and would like for you to have a cookie.

I understand the proposal also provides for “business incentives”.

I really hate these guys.

Apparently, while we spend over half a million a minute in Iraq, fiscal conservatives are wringing their sweaty hands over what this may do to the budget deficit.

Thank Jesus someone is watching the foxes play with the hens.

On a profoundly sad note, my favorite little paste eater announced he was leaving the circus today. How sad that the roaring mouse has thrown in the towel. The ONLY one with the courage, integrity and honesty to speak the truth consisitently about where we are and what we must do, is left with no choice but to save his congressional seat so that he may fight again to effect desperately needed change another day. May the powers that exist, forever favor you Mr. Dennis Kucinich. Many of us will miss your valuable contribution to what is obviously the most important political discourse thus far for all of us.

Next. From this blog on January nine:

“The Bill & Hillary machine is awesome, however. What we saw was that impressive apparatus in swift and purposeful motion at the bottom of the ninth in the second game of seven. Very impressive.

Here they come. I told ya.”

And from this blog on January four:

“I’ve alluded to to the Clintonian acumen for brawling. You’re about to see a full frontal and it will most likely get ugly. We’re about to witness how smart she really is. I can’t help but think that if she starts tossing turds, she’ll be courting the dirt nap.

Fascinating to watch Bill’s big brain churning behind his eyes as he stood to her left while she spoke. I found myself waiting for steam to to rocket from every orifice in his head.

She tossed not a single turd.”

It’s true, Bill Clinton, a man whom I celebrate and adore, needs to count to ten. I won’t address this specifically except to to say that policy is what is is germane here. That, and desperation is almost always ugly.

Last but not least, Hillary and McCain won the nod from The New York Times today. The NYT said this about Skeletor, who is fighting for third in Florida:

“The New York paper said it could not endorse Giuliani, describing the city’s former mayor as a “narrow, obsessively secretive, vindictive man” whose “arrogance and bad judgment are breathtaking.”

Ha!

Drinks for my friends.

Chelsea is hot.

I really think so.

“I think I’m turning Japanese, I think I’m turning Japanese, I really think so” – The Vapors.

Anyway.

They did swing hard. Some good stuff. We like a good dustup between mostly like and right minded people.

Obama does very well. He’s taller and tends to throw his punches down. He really is impressive.

Hills takes punches and throws uppercuts like Roberto Duran. She is tough and fascinating.

I do believe Obama’s remarks about Reagan are what they are. His point was that Reagan was a transformative president, no value placed, good or bad.

I think he was alluding to Ronnie being able to so effectively snow so many rednecks and the great unwashed. See, Reagan sucked and he was, in the contemporary tradition of Republican presidents, an absolute out of touch dipshit.

Ronald Reagan was a human hurricane for the have nots. Let me be clear here; Reagan fucking sucked.

Russia was broken on the backs of our middle class and poor. And the rich began to get richer.

Reaganomics. Trickle down. Shut the fuck up. He was an actor, and not a great one by any stretch.

Ok, sorry.

Edwards is a class act. My mother was a delegate in the Nevada caucuses and she was there for Edwards. I agree with her. He is the best of the three. She wasn’t able to make it happen. He got his “butt kicked”.

I would like to see Edwards prevail in South Carolina. A little leveling of the field would be healthy and his is a good voice in this contest. The man has integrity.

To one degree or another, I like them all. It’s not perfect, but we are lucky. This is an excellent group. Intelligent and passionate.

Then there is the big picture. The entertainment value. Not since the last time a diminutive jug eared paste eater waded in (Perot/Kucinich), has the contest for leader of the free world been so compelling.

Sometimes I wax pessimistic and realize that what we have here is the best of a worse case scenario. Our country is so broken. I understand that not one of these three may be capable or even desirous of the profound shift we absolutely need.

America is in a very bad way. Yet, despite which one prevails, it is a long step in the right direction. I really can’t afford to think about whether any one of them can do enough. Probably not.

But you know, small steps?

Drinks for my friends.

Hillary prevails because the women of New Hampshire saw her tear up. Obama carried women in Iowa. He didn’t in New Hampshire.

Who carried the Gays?

Stay with me.

I do wish Edwards had somehow been able to maintain the trifecta. Here, the difference of deep pockets glares at us. Shame on you New Hampshire. He is clearly the best of the three, at least in terms of message.

Ralph Reed is on CNN. What the hell is he doing there? I loathe this bastard. Christian Coalition fucktard. But wait, he just said what I said about Hillary. What should I do with that? Does’t matter, he’s a dickhead.

Ron Paul wrestling with Skeletor for fourth makes me grin like a poor kid with a new bike.

Looks like Richardson will take his ball home. No big loss but a good man.

Record Democratic turnout and Republican voters are actually down. The poor kid with the new bike just got a new bell and a sparkly gold banana seat.

Wolf Blitzer sucks.

Edwards is tired and so is his speech. It is true, righteous even, but tired. No original chords or melodies. Yet still, good populist stuff. Honest. The best message out there. He tells us he’s staying in the fight. That’s good news. He is the best of any of the horses running with the remotest chance of winning.

I’m afraid my favorite little paste eater is unable to hide the fork sticking out of him. Oh well. So much for massive balls and complete honesty. If the upcoming Democratic administration has an intellectual conscience, Kucinich will have a place in it. I’m not holding my breath.

The Associated Press has just forecast Hillary as the winner. There’s lots to be said for inertia. Momentum.

It may be premature, yet as I say this CNN is owning it. I’ve watched enough elections to agree.

Obama speaks. Very well. This guy is good. Really good. This time he actually references MLK. This man, is a goddamn rockstar. Confidence, charisma and composure. Half the reason I watch is to see this guy play.

Blue eyed murder in a sideswipe dress.

Hillary speaks. She has aged before me. She is metered. Measured. Following Obama is a bitch. No pun intended. She’s virtually Stepford after a master orator. She’s kinda plastic. She kinda sucks. Weak finish.

The Bill & Hillary machine is awesome, however. What we saw was that impressive apparatus in swift and purposeful motion at the bottom of the ninth in the second game of seven. Very impressive.

Here they come. I told ya.

The content was significantly more populist in both Democratic speeches.

You aren’t stupid. I know this because you’re here. I’m sure you can imagine me pulling the lever for whatever Democrat rises to the surface of this contest.

And that’s just what I’ll do.

It’s not that the Democrats are so great, although a few are, it’s that the Republicans suck so fucking much. McCain can’t even comb his own hair. Poor bastard. He’s the best they can do? He’s got a hard on for the war for painfully, and I do mean painfully, obvious reasons and I imagine he has some degree of PTS.

Dick-in-Bush snuck up behind and sucker punched him in 2000. When he woke up he was finished and bitter. Who wants this guy on the switch?

Hustler magazine has this regular feature where they render a photo of a female celebrity with a huge cock in her mouth. It’s hysterical. I know some folks over there and I’m going to call and request that they do the biggest blowhard on the planet, Mitt Romney.

Then there’s our man Skeletor. Fuck him.

Forgive me for not being able to take these assholes seriously.

Drinks for my friends.

Our little paste eater Kucinich pissed all over Darth Cheney yesterday.

I’ll begin by saying that I’m not willing to discount the role of hubris and posterity here. It is however, exceptionally brave, given that Mr. Kucinich aspires to be President and what he’s done here is opposed vehemently by the leadership of his own party.

Well, opposed by giant vaginas like Harry and Nancy. Reid and Pelosi. A sitcom about fearful, nervous elected representatives who find themselves so fearful they cannot operate in the interest of the people.

I am impressed. The little paste eater from Ohio is not here to fuck around. He undertakes and follows through on an endeavor that may be judged as magnanimous, artful and just; prosecuted for the good of the people, in the interest of subverting a consumate evil that jerked the wheel and steers America down a very bad road.

Or, when the empire suffers no restraint whatsoever, Mr. Kucinich will be seen as having pissed into the inevitable wind of greed and power. Perhaps hubris, posterity and humility.

What this man did yesterday is now a permanent part of the Congressional record. He conducted himself with aplomb and conviction. The case he made was intelligent and compelling. Richard Bruce Cheney should be tried for high crimes et. al.

This man, Dennis Kucinich, rocks.

Watch and listen.

Meanwhile, back at the theater of short attention spans and willfull ignorance, a young black man who may or may not have sold his political soul, battles an older establishment white woman who most definitely has.

They dominate our attention. Woe is us.

There are two candidates. Two. Dennis Kucinich and Ron Paul are the only two running for president who give a mad fuck about your future and the future of us. There are but two who presume to talk about the kind of change that might reverse this descent into the maelstrom.

You people scare me because your eyes are not on the ball.

We have far less than one year.

C’mon now.

brainspank.org IS coming.

Drinks for my friends.

I think it’s kinda funny that the one “moderate” Republican is a jackass like Guiliani. Then I laugh my junk off when the conservatives threaten to walk away from the Republican party if he gets the nomination.

You can’t write this shit. He really is their only chance.

So, they get their panties in such a twist that it restricts oxygen flow to their paleolithic oblongata, over Skeletor being pro choice, and they threaten to castrate themselves by going third party.

Man, I love to hate these slippery, disingenuous bastards. You think any of them give a mad fuck about the principle of life? A great many think they do, by virtue of indoctrination and religious propaganda, but they’d get vacuumed or pay for a hoovering, pun intended, immediately upon being confronted by inconvenience or convenience.

Then there’s the money. Dogmatic fundamentalists will give their morning gruel and bus faire as long as you’re in favor of capital punishment and against a woman’s right to choose. A very wealthy base built on the backs of the great unwashed.

They also know that Skeletor is no match for Billary on a level playing field. They are panicked because they know they lack the muscle to tilt that field a fourth time. They screwed the pooch on the third try.

This, kids, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, this is entertainment.

The Republican party, pictured under ‘ignorant lockstep’ in most childrens bibles and adult dictionaries, is literally gnawing on it’s own ass. It is perhaps, so preoccupied, that it’s about to ass barf all over its own face.

They have acute assfazia. The ass so closely resembles the face, that bowels pregnant with hypocrisy are unsure what direction to explode towards.

Yes mam, they’re about to shit themselves.

I’m having too much fun with this.

Now for the bad news. The Democrats suck too. Sorry. They do. Hillary and Obama box over trivial shit to distract you from Kucinich, who tells you the truth about stuff that’s important.

He’s whip smart. He has logical plans for efficacious policies as well as their implementation and he’s not here to fuck around. He’s serious.

The front runners are too far inside to even care about what you want and what you, we, really need.

An abject example: Last November there was a massive power shift in Congress dictated by the will of the people. A clear mandate was the catalyst; a reversal in the Iraq war was expected. That expectation fueled conviction at the polls more than any other issue.

Ask yourself, what do we have to show for it? Allow me to answer. Not a goddamn thing. Nothing. Same as it ever was. $700 million a day and over a million dead Iraqis. Four thousand of our own dead and over thirty thousand handicapped and damaged for life. That disgusts me.

Not one of them (Domocratic candidates), when asked if they would guarantee a complete troop withdrawal by the END of their term in 2013, could do anything but snort and stomp and make excuses.

Save one. Dennis Kucinich said three months. Done deal.

Health care and peace too.

Make sure your seatbacks and tray tables are in the upright position. Do the best you can to avoid the vulgar puppet show playing outside every window and on every screen. The same one on TV, radio and whatever dumbass magazine you’re reading.

It really is time to pay attention.

Drinks for my friends.

60 Minutes tonight delivered a message to the President of Iran on behalf of Dumbya “You’ve made terrible choices for your people, you’ve isolated your nation, you’ve taken a nation of proud and honorable people and made your country the pariah of the world”.

This guy, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, is a jackass. But is he any more of a jackass than our own president?

The Iranian president’s response should have been that he could say exactly the same of President Bush.

Certainly, as recent polls attest, Western Europe now believes that Dick-in-Bush and therefore America, are THE greatest threat to security and peace in the world today.

I pointed it out just a few days ago and tonight 60 Minutes put it out there. Russia is back and they don’t give a mad fuck about democracy.

Yeah, so the Fed cut interest rates. Band aid. Don’t forget that move simultaneously devalues the dollar; you know, the currency rapidly on it’s way to being worth the same as a peso?

Watch commodities like gold and oil. Can you say ‘recession’?

It’s kinda weird, but the Lyndon LaRouche people call me every few weeks. They called Friday night and they tell me the states are panicking over the subprime meltdown. Meanwhile it’s already on our backburner. The stockmarket bounced back didn’t it?

Oh, and China is propping us up while getting ready to strangle us for resources.

Then there’s the two wars we’re losing at $700 million a day and the one we’re lusting after in that country just to the right of the one we’re a sucking chest wound in this very evening.

You all know how we got here, but where do we go from here?

I don’t really know either. I just wanted to interrupt your Sunday evening repose with a reminder. Kucinich is my man but he stands the same chance as a fart in a whirlwind. Hillary will be a kinder gentler new boss but same as the old boss.

As much as I hate to say it, I think hope still has a home in the legislative branch. As the train speeds along the tracks this evening, she’s pointed to a Democratic executive, most likely the wife of William Jefferson Clinton.

Now, the Democrats are notorious dipshits, and they could screw this up, fail to heed an order to stop the silver bullet for a bus full of neoconservative, fundamentalist, evangelical born again christian fetuses with various disabilities, freshly aborted, for example. And the spectacular collision footage with fire and oversized heads flying everywhere will be played ad nauseum by mainstream media with even more graphic footage on the internet.

If that happens, no one will pay attention to eyewitness accounts that Sekletor Guiliani was seen at the crossing holding a mysterious handheld clumsy black box with a giant antennae while wearing his standard rictus grin.

I’m starting to wonder if the only answer is to support an even further sea change in the legislative branch. I’m getting tired of hearing Biden and friends pissing & moaning about not enough votes as an excuse for not taking off the gloves and getting down in the goddamn mud. Hey Joe, you want more of your own next November? Start swinging now. You and Reid. He used to box you know. By the way, you won’t be getting the nomination.

I don’t care about religious denomination; whether Democrat or Republican matters less each day. All I want to know is if you’re rational, truthfull and truly patriotic. Patriotic as in, let’s call an end to this failed avaricious exercise, spending lives and money we don’t have and bring these unfortunate kids home.

Then, I don’t know, explore the diplomatic tip with the same brand of conviction?

It sounds kinda weak, I know. But it would be pretty handy to be able to say to Congress, “Shut the fuck up. Do what we tell you, you’re out of excuses”.

Face it, no matter what happens, our arsonists laureate are determined to bequeath a clusterfuck. This, is the only certain thing. So, the the time to figure out what to do with said clusterfuck is today.

My suggestion is to start looking hard at your elected representatives. Starting today.

Drinks for my friends.

Aug. 30, 2007
There’s nothing wrong with that. Except, he’s liar and a hypocrite too. Poor bastard covets cock, pines for penis and thinks that’s his worst problem.
A quick google reveals this self loathing elderly hunk of man meat has a 100% approval rating from the Christian Coalition. That’s funny. They HATE fags. I wonder if it’s congruent with how he hates himself, or a completely antithetical brand of fear and loathing.
Anyway. Another closeted hypocritical gay Republican elected representative, in denial and pursuing an overtly homophobic legislative agenda.
* Voted YES on constitutional ban of same-sex marriage. (Jun 2006)
* Voted NO on adding sexual orientation to definition of hate crimes. (Jun 2002)
* Voted NO on expanding hate crimes to include sexual orientation. (Jun 2000)
* Voted YES on prohibiting same-sex marriage. (Sep 1996)
* Voted NO on prohibiting job discrimination by sexual orientation. (Sep 1996)
Source.
For fuck’s sake this guy has been in power and under a cloud for decades.
Restless leg syndrome. That’s all it was. Now that’s funny. I have to admit I stole that from an e-mail read out loud on the Cafferty File.
In case you missed my point; my disgust is about his behavior outside the bedroom, train staion or airport bathroom. I think he sucks (sorry, I crack me up) because he’s so disturbed that he’s dedicated his life to punishing his own, merely because he hates himself so much.
More and more, that mentality seems to prevail in our body politic and ever more acutely in the GOP. Foley was how long ago? They knew about Foley and you can bet your ass they knew about this deranged prick.
David Dreier anyone?
The ‘07 GOP family values schadenfreude. On tour and in a TV near you. They’ve begun to eclipse Catholic priests in the arena of depravity.
This month alone, Snow, Rove and Gonzales walk.
Again, the damage is done. All three walked away whistling.
Your seeing a full on slow motion implosion of a political party.
One can only hope that the thus far invertebrate Democrats can find the courage of the people’s convictions and lead according to principal and the will of WE THE PEOPLE.
That is our only hope, so I’m scared shitless.
I don’t typically do this but I’d like to take this opportunity to rub your goddamn noses in some pretty obvious shit. The answers to most of our problems as a country and those of the world at large are generally pretty obtainable; just an arm’s reach opposite the remote for most of us.
Ethanol from corn is an egregiously stupid idea. More expensive, less miles per gallon and enviromentally disastrous. Hemp you fools! Hemp solves all three and textiles too.
Sorry. I digress.
Obama and Hillary are the political equivalent of ethanol.
What I want you to know is that this time there is a legitimate Democratic candidate for president of this once great country. His name is Dennis Kucinich and he is a real cowboy.
The only one to openly oppose the war publicly before it even started and the only one to vote against it every time. The only one with the sack to introduce articles of impeachment in congress for Cheney. The only one with a comprehensive health plan, a not for profit health care system for every American. The ONLY ONE not beholdin to BIG PHARMA, ENERGY, INSURANCE, DEFENSE OR FINANCIAL. The only one.
Among the smartest. Definitely the most honest. My mother says he’s too liberal. She is wrong. He’s a common sense centrist. He is what we need to have a chance at cleaning this mess up.
If I’m right about Americans, he has not a hope in hell.
Prove me wrong? Pay attention? Please?
Drinks for my friends.

It occurs to me that of all the reasons to resist
impeachment of either of these two executive
dickheads, heh, the most compelling is the idea that
the Democrats, eyeing a possible win in ’08, are more
than happy to allow the consolidation of executive
power to continue so that they will literally be
seizing control upon prevailing on our electoral
college.

Pretty fucking scary. They already gave Dumbya an ass
pocket of torque to do whatever Cheney tells him when it
comes to penetrating the lives of our citizenry
without ever having to tell a single soul.

Then the bastards took a vacation.

My knee jerk was, “what a bunch of complete pussies”.
I was astonished that the dipshitocrats were still
ambulatory at all after literally folding in half when
their spines mysteriously evaporated after just one
round of the war funding bout.

Picture it. Really. Harry Reid, once a boxer, bent
so completely backward at the waist that his head
scrapes the ground as he stares from between his own
feet, his trunk pulled along by his legs like an
afterthought.

Turdblossom then flees the scene with his balloon head
buffeted by the velocity of his escape. A deal was
cut there kids. I doubt you’ll see anymore
persecution by our newly elected majority of America’s
very own Lex Luthor.

Maybe I’m naive, but I’m not sure how much I want
to know about this rabbit hole.

I’m not stupid. I understand that a lot of them sleep
in the same bed as well as share the same bathwater.
They may awkwardly mingle dicks given they’re
so clueless about homosexuality. Even the gay
ones.

Hillary and Obama lead both parties when it comes to
meeting big pharma at the crossroads and stuffing
their undergarments with filthy lucre.

Yet I still wonder just what the fuck is going on
here.

I am firmly of the opinion that it is the fundamental
responsibility of our legislative branch to seek
impeachment of our executive leaders for defying the
Constitution of The United States of America. Indeed,
for making such an egregious mess of everything they
have touched. For the nearly one million dead. And
for shamelessly lying about it every step of the way.

Regular Dick-in-Bush report cards qualify them for the short bus and helmets at the mall. Despite this, with the exception of Conyers and Kucinich, they refuse to even discuss it.

What gives?

Clinton got what I hope was a rockstar style hoovering
and lied about it. Nixon was actually complicit in
petty crimes and lied about it. In both instances
congress pretty much handed them their asses.

What gives?

What’s it going to take?

Do we need video of Cheney eating aborted babies with fucking
ketchup? Maybe he’ll use the wrong goddamn fork and
then we’ll nail his ass.

Like I said last time around, the damage is done. The
pooch has been raped with violence and merciless
repetition. America is now a poodle pulled along on one of those
skateboards from the fifties with metal wheels.

The rest of the world laughs, sheds a tear, sighs or
fears they who pull the crippled creature across the
world stage.

For seven years, the Democrats have been guilty of
aiding and abetting and there is no end in sight.

They want to pull the dog across the stage for awhile.

You have got be fucking kidding me.

Man I fucking hate these guys.

Drinks for my friends.

Um, the debates are on.

Edwards is talking the populist talk. I admit it’s
sweet to my ears. I never disliked this guy and I
don’t give a mad fuck about how rich he is.
Presidents are rich. They always have been.

Kucinich burns bright too. Conviction and by far the
best voting record on the stage. I really like the
little paste eater-vegan, with the well over six foot
bride half his age, bright red hair and a tongue
ring.

My chances of dinner in the White House probably at
least double if the first lady has a pierced tongue.

He’s not stupid, he knows that the most important
thing is not to end up a fart in a whirlwind. And
he’s comported himself with dignity and aplomb. When
they let him talk, he let’s fly with the most progressive, courageous AND logical assessments of any of the candidates.

The man is the shit.

Obama and Clinton run with ease out front. Smooth and
composed; not even breathing hard yet. They’re both
happy to be who they are and what they are. A woman
and a black man running number one and two in a race
with a still distant finish.

Biden’s sharp and he has nice teeth. Sincere and
compassionate on Darfur, eminently qualified in matters of foreign policy and military logistics. Bright guy but he has a big mouth. He still has the most logical political policy ideas for Iraq.

None of them really suck.

Kucinich just answered in favor of reparations for
African Americans. Good for him.

Bullshit though.

You can’t throw money at a problem like this so recklessly. Make it better.

Cardinal Mahoney just did that here in LA. He gave over 650 people over a million dollars each because most of them took it in
the ass or in the mouth as children from figures they
were compelled to respect no matter what.

This guy Mahoney fucking sucks.

If Mahoney had a spine he would have devoted his
energy to fixing the fucking problem instead of
scrambling for a decade to obfuscate and cover.

Ladies and gentlemen, a human turd. A massive, sticky bloody stain
on catholicism, christianity and organized religion.

Forgive me, I digress.

So, the solution to racism and inequality in this
country is not money thrown in front of a fan. It is about
spending more than would end up in each individual’s
pocket on policies and programs.

It sounds liberal and utopian, I know. But I’m talking about the difference between feeding a man once or teaching him to fish.

At the end of the day, reparations are a band-aid.
Look at how effective cold cash was for The Native
Americans.

Nope. Fix it. Get brave. Implement.

Anyway:

Dodd is sharp. He does well on Katrina.

Richardson fumbles it a little. Yet he’s sincere.

Clinton, Edwards and Obama spend a lot of time pussy
stepping around each other.

By the way, this format is genius. Excellent
questions. It makes me very curious about what sort
of blunderbuss the repuglicans will be stepping in front of.

Most of them would have tripped on their dicks by now.
See, they’re stupid and dogmatic. It’s a weakness.

Sorry, had to throw that in.

Edwards did well with a query about the affect his
faith would have on policy. This guy is very good.

Cooper fires a nice one about the difference between
civil rights and the rights of gays.

Obama rocks it pretty good when he posits leaving the religious
question up to individual denominations but insisits,
all states adopt parity in laws dealing with with
civil rights, marriage and sexual orientation.

For what it’s worth, I have long maintained that the issue of gay rights is very simply an issue of civil rights.

ON IRAQ:

Biden strives to be realistic. I admire that. He does know this shit.

Hillary is once again, sleek. She talks about trying
to win repuglicant support since the election. She
does well in acknowledging that there is no military
solution. She drops the ball when she reaches out to
the flat earthers though.

Methinks it’s time to run them the fuck over. Public
will is on your side. What are you waiting for?
Understand, we are waiting on you.

If republicans had a gallon of juice left, it would all be over except the shouting. All the people on the stage would do well to own that fact.

So, Kucinich swings hard and connects. His answer is
don’t give them anymore goddamn money. He is right.

HE is RIGHT. This mouse roars.

Horsepower to torque to pavement.

Work with me here.

I must admit, I like these guys (including Hillary). They all appear to be more or less genuine, at least in the context of the contemporary politician.

They’re kicking the shit out of the repugnicants in fund raising and that’s a good sign.

Yet, it’s also quite ominous. Particularly in the the instances of Hillary and Obama, it tells us that behind the curtain, they are both fervently engaged in a 69 with big pharma and big oil. It’s that sort of symbiotic relationship with the dark side that leads to – meet the new boss, same as the old boss.

It wasn’t that long ago that Hills had her ass handed to her over an admittedly far too convoluted national health care plan by one of those very beasts.

She cannot hope to craft and implement a fair and efficacious universal health care policy if she’s remains that carnally connected. Same goes for Obama.

The Kennedy’s tried that shit and ended up dead.

There may be a light at the end of this long dark tunnel, but I worry about the size of the opening.

We may just be lucky enough to end up with the lesser of two evils in our legislative and executive branches. I hope we don’t screw this pooch.

Even if we don’t, it’s like getting a record deal; that’s when the real work begins. If we end up with a Democratic President, the odds still wouldn’t favor us.

Vigilance won’t be obsolete anytime soon.

Drinks for my friends.

Imagine if you will, a world where that fucking lizard Cheney has been impeached.

I doubt it would come to that, but what if our legislators, under extreme pressure and heat, developed tungsten spines and brought gravity to bear on our arsonists laureate? So much so that our man Darth was forced to walk?

The will, the very fiber of the Republican party would be disrupted like DNA exposed to massive nuclear radiation. The good, the bad and the ugly of the neoconserative to moderate Right wing would excrete a little gore, some mucus, and leave a trail of ash.

Rudderless.

They would have no idea what’s next because these days they look at Dick-in-Bush for what not to do as much as for what to do. Hard to believe they still stare so hard at that map, even while their eyes begin to resemble it’s random snaking red arteries.

Already lost and clawing. Taking jackasses like Mit Romney and Fred Thompson seriously.

The Republican party is more bereft of intellectual and therefore ideological purity than ever before.

We on the Left seem to have a glut of glad handing superhuman fundraisers. Shameless, spineless paper tiger/whores. This last quarter, Obama raised thirty two million fucking dollars. He smoked the Clinton machine.

We are now them and they are us.

“I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together. See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly. I’m crying.” -I Am The Walrus.

The Left has Kucinich, and the Right has Ron Paul. Two men who, right or wrong, have the courage of their convictions. Neither has a snowflake’s chance in hell on an August day in a borosilicate kiln. Not going to happen. One can only hope they are able to steer the debate a little before wafting away as vapor.

It may very well be time to shrug these petty notions of left and right, of black and white.

Defining the difference between good and bad is not something we should aspire to, it’s what we should engage in. It is there that we should take our sticks and rifles to draw lines. That is the distinction we should pursue.

Ideology may just be for the stupid. It is without a doubt for the ignorant.

The sane among us are well aware of the difference between right and wrong. Ocassionally it may require an assessment of our own hearts and our own minds, but with the sane, the truth inevitably prevails.

What’s it going to take for deliverance? Steadfast adherance to truth, justice and the American way?

It has long since ceased to be a matter of partisan concerns. Quite some time ago, it emerged as a struggle of right versus wrong.

It is time to act accordingly. Move beyond the labels.

“Semolina pilchard, climbing up the Eiffel Tower.
Elementary penguin singing Hari Krishna.
Man, you should have seen them kicking Edgar Allan Poe.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g’joob g’goo goo g’joob.
Goo goo g’joob g’goo goo g’joob g’goo.”

The state of our union is a comedy to those who think and a tragedy to those who feel.

I borrowed part of that last bit from a guy named Horace Walpole.

Drinks for my friends.

Disclaimer: Forgive me. I thought the debates last night warranted more of my air chomping pontification. I hope you can still breath by the time I’m done. Those with compromised mental lung capacity are encouraged to abstain.

What Biden glossed over with his pedantic soliloquy about not having enough votes to end the war in the Senate, was exactly what Edwards was talking about. Edwards was talking to both Hillary and Barack. They both voted nay, but snuck in and out to do so. They hid their convictions as best they could. Biden complained about having only 50 votes, as opposed to the 67 needed to purchase the veto proof vest.

So? Really, so fucking what? I expect there to be fifty votes in opposition. If the absolute most you can hope to accomplish is to remind them that they, even with Lieberman, don’t have a majority either, then for fuck’s sake do it. That is what we asked for, literally, in the last election.

And then, they veto it. Dick-in-Bush. The Blackhats.

What I’m looking for now is a whole bunch of you bastards, especially the democrats, to resubmit the same bill or as close as you can get to it, over and over and over. Ad goddamn nauseum.

Help me out here, is that too much to ask?

Newsflash you spineless pricks, the majority in this country will not accuse you of undermining our troops. As Kucinich pointed out, there’s enough money in the pipeline to get them home. The ones that would point that finger are just plain stupid. You can’t help them and you won’t reach them. They are those that would embrace Nixon, they dwell in the hydrilla.

Now I know that the lot of you, being politicians, are shameless harlots, so here’s your chance to suck up to THE MAJORITY. Democrats aren’t used to this and they are as a group, usually pretty shy. Well, what they are, are sniveling whiny cowards. Petunias all.

So you caved. Wilted. Pissed yourselves and darted away with the look of stupid eyed pigeons. 10 out of 50 democrats in the Senate had enough sack to do the right thing.

I still like Biden. I still like them all. But Edward’s point was both germane and salient. We now have a chance, for the first time in seven cold years, to swing a hard hook to the head of Dick-in-Bush and there’s no reason we shouldn’t. We are right. They are wrong. And they’ve made it obvious.

Instead our esteemed and newly elected body politic gets held down by a few bullies, is forced into a tutu, smeared with lipstick and pisses itself before entering the cafeteria to cast it’s vote.

If some greater number of you don’t start to own your own souls, we’re gonna end up with a new Puppet Mayor Arsonist Laureate.

Is Richardson wearing a toupe’?

Drinks for my vertebrates.

“Got one foot out the door
Time to hit the road
Ain’t no match for your mean ol’ man
I think it’s time to roll”-Van Halen

Is Richardson sporting a toop?

I liked Biden’s anger and conviction on Darfur.

The tone was actually good. The issues were appropriate.

It was, dare I say, somewhat informative. Gasp!

Understand, this is my sports. Beyond my altruistic and civic concerns, there exists a prurient interest as well. I like that Edwards came out swinging.

Obama and Clinton were of stately composure. Neither looking to pick a fight. Both, willing and able to trade punches.

Kucinich did well. He’s catching a little fire. He rocked the convention yesterday. Did you see his wife? The fact that she needs to lean down to talk to him makes him just a little cooler in my book. Underdog. Yet, a mouse that is roaring. I like this man.

I understand she has a tongue ring. Sheezus. Everyone from Martha and Joe Bob to Nathaniel and Felicity are gonna have serious reservations about a First Lady with a hole in her tongue and an ornament hanging out of it.

Thus far this pale little soup smelling vegetarian has my vote. He looks the least presidential but he has gargantuan balls. There’s a fine line between clever and stupid. A narrower swath than you would imagine between courage and idiocy.

This man is very brave and very smart.

I’m watching CNN on a Tivo delay so I just heard some asshole who used to work for Romney and McCain say Kucinich is completely irrelevant.

Look, I understand it’s early and I understand that my horse is looking like a gelding among a handful of very fast stallions. But this man is the real deal. He’s the only one to speak truth to power. He says impeach Cheney, pull the troops now, he calls out the big insurance and pharma lobbies on health care, his voting record is proof of a man with the courage of his convictions.

The best I can realistically hope for is that he gains some ground as America wakes up and therefore, a little more mass. Just enough to hang in there for awhile, enough to steer the national dialog.

Either way, he has my vote. I’m so fucking done with the lesser of two evils. Fuck pragmatic in the neck. I think it’s time to stretch. This hasn’t been good enough for a long time.

Despite the idea of Mr Kucinich winning the nomination being akin to betting an infant won’t fill it’s britches with mustard colored shit, He can and should be a pivot in this process.

Speaking of shit, he and his people will require lungs that can refine it into oxygen. They are going to have to positively brawl to keep this spunky little bastard relevant. To do that, they’ll all need to embrace the big picture. He will not get the nomination. And he will not be invited to be a running mate. But he still may be the most important horse in this race.

He is the only one not politicking. The only one not fucking around. The only one saying exactly what he thinks and intends to do if given the chance. He pledges to go after NAFTA and the WTO. He’ll end the war and impliment a truly green energy policy.

This man is not here to fuck around.

Neither am I. Absent some clusterfuck involving his integrity, Dennis Kucinich has my vote.

Please pay attention.

Drinks for my friends.